She never stops!

My nasty mean mother just never stops.Now she smirked that it was MY fault her lack of supervision of me as a child; how I would travel all over the city alone, as “YOU should have known better!” WHAT? Excuse ME? I was a little KID, like 5-6 years old! SHE should have known better than to leave me alone and unsupervised! I was lucky I wasn’t killed; hit by a car or snatched by some pedophile! I even remember crossing the busy streets alone at 5 years old! I mean, why even HAVE a child if you’re not able  or there to take care of it and to safely watch it? Isn’t that the parents’ JOB?  A parent is to protect and nurture the child, to love it and raise it in a loving family environment.She also snickered to me about my depression, “You got married and had the family you wanted, so stop complaining! Isn’t that enough? Don’t be greedy! What more do you want? Can’t you just be happy?” as it that somehow “disqualifies” me from being depressed,and never validates me and thinks I don’t even have a “right” to BE depressed,and failing to see her role in it,and doesn’t realize that I also need love and support; that merely having a family isn’t “enough” to ensure one’s happiness and isn’t a “prevention” of unhappiness, or some “magic” talisman that removes your ability to be unhappy in life. Somehow though everything’s always MY fault; I’m always to blame, even as a little kid who should have been better loved and supervised. She was never there for me and never a mother to me. I practically raised myself and she is still toxic to this day and although physical wounds heal emotional ones do not; they last forever.I can see WHY my father left her, not that I’m in any way “excusing” his adultery but I CAN see how miserable she must have made him, how hard it is to live with her, how difficult she is to love,and how she drives people away with her cruelty,hate and spitefulness.But as always, nothing is ever HER fault; always someone else’s and she never takes any responsibility or blame for anything.