The Ones That Worry Me The Most.

 Of my 11 kids there are 2 that worry me the most, give me the most sleepless nights and cause me the most grief and concern,and yes, they are teens; the 15 and 16 YR old. One I worry about his atrophy and the other is just plain weird and disturbing. They both worry me to no end….

The 16 YR old is aimless. He has no interest, no motivation and no work ethic. He finished grade 11 and still has absolutely no idea what he wants to do for a living post-secondary. University? College? A vocational trade? He has no idea. He is always behind with his school work,complains endlessly,has the attention span of a fly, is easily distracted, procrastinates, does a half-assed job, has no interests and his future is uncertain. As well as that he is also now a heathen. He has renounced God and our family’s strong religious values and now proudly announced he no longer believes in God and that He is a “myth” a “Magical Sky Daddy” and that religion is a “crutch” for “simple-minded people” and not for “thinking people.” He mocks and blasphemes all that is holy and is constantly ridiculing my faith and beliefs. He has turned his back on God and religion and I hope and pray that it is merely a phase and that soon he will return to his faith.He uses God’s Name in vain and says insulting things about Him and church.

The 15 YR old worries me as well but in another way. Ever since she fell on her head at the park at age 5 or so and knocked herself unconscious she has never been “right”.Ever since then she seems to have “lost” her smart and has been weird. She dresses almost always all in black and with skulls, chains, studs, etc. and looks like a Goth or a punk. She dyes her hair in rainbow colours(all at once) and looks like a parrot.She is aloof ,morose,and sullen and lives in her room. I never see or hear from her.I am lucky if I hear 2 words from her all month. She avoids everyone. The most concerning, however, is she appears to have a gender-identity issue. She has always looked, acted and dressed like a boy. She even says she hates skirts(I make her wear them to church) and even wears boys’ ties and boys’ swimming trunks!She only ever wears boys’ clothes. Many people even think she’s a boy and refer to her as “he”, “him” and our “son.” She has never acted or looked like a girl or taken interest in girls’ things. She never played with dolls.The other kids even call her “Kevin”.I fear she is a trans-gendered” boy” and this is a big sin.God made the sexes different and distinct for a reason and to want to be the opposite sex is just wrong, disturbing, weird and sinful. I worry about her eternal soul. My hubby laughs off my concern and isn’t worried but I am.

Hopefully as they get older and grow up to become adults these are just phases that will pass and that they will end up ok in the end; that he will find a passion, interest and job that he likes, is good at, and will make a decent living at,that he will come back to God and his values he was raised with,and that she will NOT end up gay or get a sex-change operation and will marry a man, be more feminine and have a family.I know those Liberals would be horrified that this bothers me and is such an issue but it is; it’s not just a matter of expressing one’s individuality,creativity,challenging parents,experimenting with various styles, rebelling, having their own style,or of even being different; it’s a moral issue,and this IS a big thing to a religious conservative mother. It is my job to see they are raised right, live clean upright moral lives and make it to Heaven. That is my job….and I can’t even get the 16 YR old to take an interest in anything(I see him working at McDonald’s or Walmart the rest of his life!) with no goals or ambition,having his soul lost forever and it being too late, and fear the 15 YR old will get gender reassignment surgery and become a “gay” “man”.She seems seriously messed up. They are the ones that worry me the most.Sometimes I even wonder if having kids was seriously even worth it…