Nancy.

 Nancy was my best friend in grade 6 and I still think about her to this day. The loss of that friendship is also one of my life’s big regrets. When my best friend Terri moved away the summer of grade 5 Nancy moved into the house next door to her, which was also just down my street. She had just moved from Regent Park(a downtown ghetto) and she was chubby, had dark waist-length hair, was very smart(I always figured she’d be a lawyer or something when she grew up), and obsessed with horses.She had an older sister that worked in a store and an older brother in highschool. She was also in my class and we quickly became best friends. We played together every day, hanging out at my house playing Barbies, going to the park, whacking tennis balls against the school wall, and rarely, at her place, and we were inseparable.

I once asked her why she was always over at my house and we never went to hers and she confessed her dad was a drunk.One day she bent my thumb back really hard(so much it hurt) as a “joke” and I got mad and went home, but the next day I was over it and called on her….but from that moment on she stopped being my friend.Just like that. Even though it WAS her fault,and despite my repeated attempts for over  a year to make up she rejected it. I would call for her,phone her, invite her over to come play, gave her Christmas cards and invited her over to my sleep-overs and parties but she always refused.She wouldn’t even speak to me; it was as if I didn’t even exist anymore. This left a big hole and regret in my heart and I earnestly tried to repair the friendship and she never budged.She was one of my best friends and this really hurt. It got worse the next year in grade 7 when she joined the bullies in taunting me, even telling them stories that I didn’t know how to blow my nose, that I kissed my dog on the lips and ate out of the same dish as it, etc.I was shattered.We used to be friends!

We later went on to different highschools(I ended up going to 3 in total) and I saw her the odd time during grade 9(walking or on the streetcar) but whenever I’d wave or call out to her she’d just ignore me. I never did find out what became of her after that and the only thing I’d heard as an adult was that she was divorced. I have always deeply regretted losing her as a friend even though in all honesty I did all I possibly could.Some things leave such regret and scarring on your heart that you carry it with you for the rest of your life. This was one of those things and I still think about her to this day and could never figure out why she so easily tossed away our friendship like that, esp. over something so trivial.I even tried to find her on Facebook but no luck. I still have hope that one day, even now after all these years, that we can re-connect and have my friend back….

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