St.Augustine And Our Son.

 It deeply concerns me that our 17 YR old has turned his back on God. He has turned his back on religion, faith, and morality as well. He only goes to church because it’s a rule in our house; you live here, you go to church.I know once he moves out he’ll stop going. He said he’s an atheist and he doesn’t even believe in God and that the Bible is a “book of myths” and that God is an “invisible sky daddy”, and that “religion is for stupid people”,etc. He also delights in mocking my faith and it worries me that when he dies that he’ll go to Hell and be eternally separated from God. I pray every day that he comes to his senses and comes back to God and to his faith. I pray this atheist thing is just a phase or that he’s just doing it to piss me off. I pray every day that he returns to God before it’s too late. It reminds me of St. Augustine and his mother St. Monica. He was a godless pagan and heathen and he lived a dissolute hedonistic life,had a mistress and even fathered an illigitimate child. and his mother was a godly woman who prayed for his conversion daily.He seemed as hopeless and far gone as my son, but his mother’s faithful prayers over the years worked: he was converted and became one of the greatest Saints! I am hoping it will be the same with my son. It’s never too late; people can change and miracles can happen. People have fallen away from their faith before and have returned…

I am concerned for my cousin and his brothers as well; they never knew God and grew up without religion or morals and now have immoral lifestyles incl. sex and drugs and are headed away from Heaven when they die as well, and all I can do is pray for them, but I grew up without a religious upbringing as well but unlike them I  still WAS always spiritual and still always had a strong faith and love of God  and worshipped on my own until I was able to start going to church by myself  at 13, whereas they never had the desire or the inclination and now they, like my son, mock religion and God, and say blasphemous things(such as “Church is a place where you worship a guy that was a zombie that turns into a cracker”),which I think is even worse than merely just not believing.It really pains my heart to think they will be eternally separated from God unless they repent and change their ways,and it’s sad that they were never exposed to it or taught how; religion and the love of God is the best gift that you can teach and offer a child; the gift of salvation, faith, hope, and love; to raise your kids for Heaven.


As well, I saw on the news about a Walk For CANINE Cancer; seriously, people? For DOGS? Get your priorities straight! With only so many resources around raise money for HUMAN welfare; don’t waste it on animals; put it to better use, like for helping people like the 19 YR old autistic boy functioning at a 3 YR old level I read about where he will no longer be in residential care as  he has “aged out” and the funding is no longer there and his parents can no longer handle him at home and have already spent over 750 000$ of their own $$$ and sold their home taking care of him,and he will now end up homeless on the street; fund raise and help PEOPLE that are in desperate  need, not waste it on animals when there is  so much human suffering that needs addressing and should come first! There is also this  energy company that China has offered to buy and the company execs and shareholders have agreed to the buy out but for some weird reason the gov’t has to approve it before it can happen….what the hell? What kind of fascist country IS this anyway? Why does the gov’t have to approve of  the sale of a PRIVATE company?This stupid country has always been against foreign investment! Canada SUCKS!

My daily headaches are also back again; the pills only worked for a little while, and it’s tiresome  that my hubby and I just co-exist and merely tolerate eachother, we hate eachother and always fight, and will just  grow angry, bitter, old, and die, and it’s sad that I’ll have lived my entire life never being loved  or knowing love.