Bucket List.

BucketList Here is my “Bucket List”, my list of things I’d like to do/ accomplish before I die,some possible, others not so likely:

– Ride in a Smart Car

– Have a Chihuahua again

– Move out of this country

– Leave this town

– Visit Australia

-Visit South Africa

– Live on my own

– Experience love

– Be happy again

– Reconnect with old friends

– See my old house again

– Get a boob reduction

– Get closure

– Have my old life back

– Go back to the past

-Have my mother move out

-See a hippo

-Be able to love myself

-Forgive myself

-Let go of anxiety, fear, worry,and stress


As well, it’s been so hot the pool water’s 90 F the hottest it’s ever been and the chlorine keeps being burned off  from the hot sun and the reading’s are always at zero for chlorine levels even “shocking” the pool every day and using stabilizer, and the radio DJ said he did an experiment: it was 70 C in his car and he put bacon and raw cookie dough on his dashboard and it actually cooked crispy in there and he ate it! Our second-oldest is also visiting for a couple of weeks before she moves to Japan in early August and she said her apartment has a picture-perfect view: she can see Mount Fuji from one direction and the sea from another, the 10 and 12 YR olds are at sewing camp this week and my hubby has to go in to Toronto for work for one of the days and isn’t able to bring them there and back and snarled at me,”It’s not MY problem!” and I told him, “You’re the only one that drives so it IS your problem!” he’s such an asshole and doesn’t even care if they miss it or not ( so now they’ll have to take a taxi) even though the kids are SUPPOSED to come first and then he gets all nasty to ME when I call him out on it! He’s just a shitty father AND a shitty husband and I end up receiving the brunt of most of the shit. I’m just so miserably unhappy with him and meeting him is one of my biggest regrets in life.I see other people are happy with their marriage, their family,and their life,and I wonder, “Why can’t  I be,too?”