The Waiting.

Waiting I went to a walk-in clinic to have my prescriptions re-newed since my doctor retired and I don’t have anyone to re-new them for me and my strategy was to get there as soon as it opened so I would be one of the first ones there and wouldn’t have to wait too long ( one thing I HATE is waiting!) but of course that didn’t work out( nothing ever does for me) because the sneaky buggers opened an HR early and there were already 12 people in front of me! I had to wait 1 1/2 HRS in total; 1 HR for my number to be called and to register and then another 30 min. after that for the doctor to see me. Luckily he re-newed them for 6 months though like I’d requested so at least I don’t have to worry about it for awhile now. It’s interesting to watch all the other people waiting there as well; incl. one poor guy who looked like he was dying with some sort of Flu( and who was wearing a medical mask) which I hope I don’t catch, and loudly complaining how ridiculous it was they opened an HR early and he had to wait so long, and the drunk old guy who was so loud telling everyone how crappy the healthcare is in this country and how he’s never going to the local hospital as it’s a “death trap”,and most of them looked like slovenly rednecks,too, but that’s pretty well what we get here!

Because my hubby had to drive me the teens had to take a taxi to Cadets (they CAN walk except it was heavy rain and they were in uniform) except it didn’t work out that way: the taxi never showed up so my mother called them, irate, to complain, and they said it WAS at our house and she said “It’s NOT; I’m standing right outside and no one’s here!” as it turned out it went to the wrong address (people are SOOOOOO dumb here!) and then she heard the driver say over the dispatch(thru the phone) that he was being chased down the street by a bunch of Cadets(ours) so he took off( afraid he was being held up?) and my mother told them,”They’re the fare you’re supposed to be picking up; they’re trying to flag him down!” so they ended up having to walk in the rain afterall. I can’t believe how half-assed, stupid,and incompetent people ARE in this town! Really!

I also realize that I have spent most of my life waiting, and mostly waiting for things that never happen ; waiting to be loved, waiting for the bullying and abuse to stop, waiting for my life-long bad luck and misfortune to end,waiting for all the traumas to be over, waiting to fit in, waiting to be happy, waiting to be accepted, waiting for my family to treat me better, waiting to escape a place I hate,waiting for things to look up, waiting for my “break”, waiting to die, just…..waiting. Always waiting.

As well, our oldest ranked 22nd out of 236 in his district at work and he’s only been there for 3 months, when I told my mother that I also pray for the kids’ future spouses and their kids (such as that they don’t “settle” and that they marry for love, that their spouses love them, and aren’t abusive, unfaithful, or alcoholics, and that their kids are healthy) she snickered, “and that they’re nice to THEIR kids!” a “jab” at me, insinuating that I’M not nice to MY kids, always trying to get in little digs” at me and belittle me, and whenever I defend myself and stand up for myself against her and my hubby’s maltreatment she says I’M a “bully” even though it’s everyone else that always bullies ME, and whenever *I* need a ride somewhere my hubby always complains he “doesn’t have time” but he always takes my mother and has no problem when SHE needs a ride( and she does alot more often than I do) and they always stick together but gang up on me as well, and they’re nice to eachother but treat me like crap.

I’m still waiting….