When I was growing up I used to draw pictures of my future wedding gown and of the mansion I would live in one day,and I was the Ugly Duckling, and hoped that one day I would grow up to be the beautiful swan, except I never did; I never got better looking, and stayed ugly. When I was a teen I also dreamed (and actually thought) that I would end up marrying a European nobleman, making me a Countess, Baroness, etc, which would be laughable if it weren’t so pathetic and sad; what would I possibly have to offer European nobility? I’m not pretty, sophisticated, or even half-way intelligent, yet even so I had the same fairy-tale hopes and dreams that most little girls do, that one day their prince will come, your knight in shining armour, but in real life you just end up with a retard in tin foil! I ended up with a redneck that leaves his dirty laundry on the floor,wears his shoes in the house, eats with his fingers, farts all the time,slurps from his dish, drinks out of the milk jug, doesn’t have the courtesy to spray the deoderizer in the bathroom to cover his shit stench, and who leaves the empty roll of toilet paper when he’s used it all up because he’s too damn lazy to replace the roll! It didn’t help being fat, ugly, and stupid, though, guys aren’t exactly lining up to date girls like me, noblemen or otherwise. I was so stupid and naive to think a nobleman would want me; I couldn’t even get regular guys to notice me! I’m invisible and guys don’t even look at girls like me. I gave up on love and romance a long time ago. Now I’d settle just for being HAPPY but it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen any time soon,either.Sigh.
As well, another friend in Ireland has to have emergency gallbladder surgery,and an old friend I’ve known for 25 YRS his mother died after having cancer for YRS and his best friend from highschool just died a few days ago, and our friend from our old church died from a brain tumour not too long ago and now his wife is in a coma from liver failure and not expected to live thru today(the only “good” is they’ll be together again)…so much so soon….so sad…why is it people that DON’T want to die end up dying and people that DO want to die(like me) never do? It’s just not fair. If only we could somehow trade.
The 19 YR old also said “God hates fat people!” a jab aimed at me meant to insult me because I’m fat and I told him “God made people in all different shapes, sizes,and colours and He doesn’t hate anyone!” I honestly don’t know WHY he’s so mean and what made him like that because that’s NOT the way *I* raised him!