Timothy The 6 YR old watches this TV show called ” Timothy Goes To School”. It’s about a raccoon and his friends in Kindergarten. There was one episode about what he wanted to be when he grows up and I joked “alive!” and then I started saying how it would be like if he was in the REAL world and when he’s an adult, and the 10 YR old and I were making up all these funny jokes and episode titles that would never be used and here’s what we came up with up, in no particular order:

Episodes you’ll never see….


– Goes Off To War

– Gets Taken Hostage

– Gets Shot

– Goes To Jail

-Gets Arrested

– Gets Drunk

– Gets Stoned

– Dies

– Gets Cancer

– Smokes Crack

– Gets Mugged

– Gets A Girl Pregnant

– Builds A Bomb

– Becomes A Terrorist

– Goes Insane

– Sets A Fire

– Drops Out Of School

– Plays With Matches

– Loses His Virginity

– Becomes A Delinquent

– Gets Kidnapped

– Drops Out Of School

– Ends Up Homeless

– Gets Molested

– Gets Hit By A Car

– Has A Heart Attack

– Commits Suicide

– Gets Audited

– Gets Herpes

– Joins A Gang

– Gets In A Car Accident

– Becomes An Orphan

– Joins A Cult

-Becomes A Hell’s Angel

-Has A Stroke

-Goes Bankrupt

-Goes To The Foodbank

-Is In A School Shooting

-Becomes a Hobo

-Turns To Crime

-Becomes A Jihadist