I’m Not Pretty.

Me,grade4 I’m not pretty. I never was and I never will be. I was even a homely goofy-looking kid( as seen in the photo here, in my grade 4 school photo). Not only am I bullied, rejected,  and ostracized for having what I now know is Asperger’s ( I didn’t know at the time, all I knew was that I was different and not like  other people and that they always called me “weird” but I never knew why) but also due to my unfortunate looks. I am always held back and limited due to my looks. I don’t have the opportunities and missed out on alot in life I wouldn’t have otherwise if I wasn’t ugly. Life is very cruel to the ugly.What I wouldn’t give to be pretty.My life would have been so different.

Me,now and I’m still ugly now.I’ve never been given a second( or even a first!) glance, never asked to Prom or out on dates, never asked to dance, never whistled at, never had a Secret Admirer, never been the object of anyone’s dreams, never been stalked, never had love letters, never been anyone’s fantasy, never been popular, never had guys fight over me, never had a boyfriend in highschool,  was never anyone’s “crush”, never had a torrid romance, never been anyone’s One Great Love, never been pretty or felt pretty, always hated my looks,hate looking in the mirror, etc. but even so…

God still loves me anyway. Just as I am. He looks on the heart.

I pray every day that I can see myself the way He does; that I can see the value and worth in myself and in my life the way that  He sees me.