The Dress.

PromDress I had my last app’t with the surgeon in the city and he was an HR late seeing me but said I’ve healed up nicely and it was my last app’t. He also said, “I see you haven’t been avoiding the sun!” and when I said, “I LOVE the sun!” he goes, “I can tell!” Since we were in the city I took the 13 YR old( almost 14 YR old) with me as she needs a dress for her friend’s graduation and the cadets formal dance.(She did have one but  she wasn’t able to sew straps on it like she’d hoped) and there’s a fancy dress boutique just a couple of blocks down from the hospital. I was hoping they’d be having a sale now prom season is over and I was right! She chose the blue dress pictured here, reg.179$ but got it for 75% off. I got it for her birthday present. She loves it so much and it makes her so happy.It’s hard to see in the photo but the bodice and tulle part of the skirt have specks of silver too which match her shoes and purse! While we were there I also tried on a pearl white iridescent sequin cocktail dress with 3/4 sleeves just for the heck of it but I don’t have the body for that kind of thing anymore and I looked like a stuffed sausage; it’s another one of those where it looks better hanging on the rack. YRS ago(when I was in my 20’s) I used to be able to pull off a look like that though. Sigh.

On the way there we also drove thru a bad storm with rain so heavy you couldn’t even see the car in front of you or even the lines on the highway dividing the lanes; it looked like a thick mist or a thick white fog and then later on I heard there was a tornado warning nearby! Well, shit….that’s why! We nearly ran out of gas as well and were practically running on fumes and my hubby goes, “Oh, we have something like 65 litres used up and the van only takes around 70 litres….” now WHY did he have to go and tell me something like that for? Couldn’t he just fill up and not say anything? The 13 YR old also dyed her hair a lighter blonder for her birthday; it already was a “dirty-blonde/light brown” before(I don’t let them dye their hair until they’re 14) and my mother sneered that no one likes Buddy and she didn’t want a dog then and still doesn’t now yet here he is but did acknowledge that he’s “Good for YOU!” ( but in the tone as if that isn’t good enough and not a good enough reason, as if I don’t matter and it doesn’t count) but that isn’t true though; only her, the 19 YR old and the 8 YR old don’t like him; everyone else does; they love him and are happy we have him, and he doesn’t like the 8 YR old because he’s always teasing him,and he always barks at the 19 YR old because she always wears black and looks like Morticia and dogs can only see in black and white so if someone wears only all black all they see is a moving shadow and it freaks them out.

My hubby was also in the livingroom doing something with the Tablet and I went in and put on some music and he rips into me that I’m “selfish” and the he “was there first”, etc, even though there’s no reason we couldn’t BOTH do separate things and when I’ve tried that “I was here first” it never works with HIM; if I’m using something first( the hose, for example) he’ll just take it off me if HE wants it, or if I’m using an extension cord and he wants it for something he’ll just unplug whatever I’m doing instead of waiting until I’m done, and when I asked him he even had the nerve to say it’s NOT the same(yeah…because it’s HIM!) and when I asked if he thinks something for HIM is more important he said yes! He also said that he “does everything” for me when really all he does is drive me everywhere(and only because I can’t drive otherwise I’d just do it myself) other than that he just treats me like crap! The 12 YR old also always says to me, “Go away! No one LIKES you!” and I wish I could meet someone who could take me away from all this and I’d go away and never look back. I need someone to fill me up deep inside me, to love me, take care of me, and treat me the opposite way my family does. I KNOW there HAS to be more to life than this….