Fork Off!

Forks My mother has been collecting sets of cutlery at the grocery store. For each 10$ you spend you get 1 point and once you have 30 points( that is, once you’ve spent 300$) you get a free pack of utensils(seen in the photo here) consisting of a fork, knife,and 2 spoons, and they’re real silver,too! The special started in September and goes until January and would you believe that we already have 11 sets? Our goal is to have 12 sets. I can’t believe that we’ve spent so much on food and have been able to accumulate so many utensil sets so quickly but we really need them as we can never find forks, knives, or spoons; they always seem to disappear into the kids’ rooms and elsewhere. My mother said it also reminds her of when she was a kid; she said that when they’d go to the cinema you could collect dishes; they’d get a dish with each ticket and each time they’d go they’d get another dish and after awhile you’d end up with an entire set. Movie tickets were so cheap then too(not like today!) that they’d go every weekend.

As well,for church yesterday the 12 and 14 YR olds were making fun of my clothes, saying my blue mohair sweater, black crushed velvet skirt,and matching blue eyeshadow were “hideous” and making cruel barbs about my appearance and at my expense(Buddy still loves me though; he doesn’t care what I wear or what I look like), reminding me of the bullies that used to torment me in school and I tried so hard to avoid but now it’s almost impossible when it’s my own FAMILY and I live in the same HOUSE as them(so I don’t have ANY refuge or safe haven) and the 21 YR old was also laughing at this photo of a kid who lost his leg to cancer,too,and the kids are always so mean and it really bothers me and then they have the nerve to blame ME and say,”That’s the way YOU raised us!” except I didn’t….I don’t laugh at kids with cancer, I don’t make fun of handicapped people, I’m not racist, I don’t blaspheme holy things, I don’t go along with the world and turn away from God like they do; I’M the one that’s always tried hard to raise them godly; I don’t know where they GOT it FROM, other than the world’s influence….but that’s NOT the way *I* raised them!! I’m heartbroken, ashamed and embarrassed they turned out that way!!

When I was putting my “face” on for church yesterday I also noticed my skin looks yellow again so I must be jaundiced again like I was before when I had liver failure with my last pregnancy and when I pushed my finger onto my skin and let go it DID leave a white mark behind….and my lips have a bluish tinge to them as well, so either I’m just cold or I have a circulation problem, possibly indicating a heart problem,and I’ve gained so much weight( 20 pounds in fluid retention in just 2 months!) that I almost weigh as much as a baby HIPPO now,too! Hopefully the GI and Internal Medicine specialists can figure it out…

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