I read this article recently that says in Heaven the first person you will meet( as well as deceased relatives, friends,and those whom you’ve prayed for as well as God, Jesus,etc.) is yourself; that is, your REAL self, your TRUE self; the self that God has made, and not the fake, phony self that you have put on, created, fabricated,and presented to the world, but who you are meant to be. Your true self will be revealed as you really are, and you will know your value, your worth,your purpose in life,and what plans God had for you. All will be revealed.
So it got me thinking: who am I? I have been told, reminded endlessly, bullied, put down, criticized, belittled, demeaned,and devalued my entire LIFE that I am nothing; that I am ugly, stupid, worthless, unlovable,useless,etc. you get the picture, yet in Heaven I will be made “whole” and “perfect”, without spot or blemish. I will no longer be ugly, fat, dumb, have Asperger’s, Social Phobia, or depression. I will see myself, my value,and my worth the way GOD sees me, as thru His Eyes, and His Ways are not our ways and He sees the Bigger Picture. I do wonder what my true purpose really is though as everything I have ever hoped for, tried, or wanted has ended in failure. Being a mother was my dream but I even failed at that,too, so obviously being a mother wasn’t my purpose,yet I haven’t done anything else, so what exactly IS my purpose? Why DID He create me, choose me, design me?
I heard that some people’s purpose is to pray and that *MIGHT* be mine as I HAVE always been a “Prayer Warrior” and prayed for EVERYONE, constantly, all the time, even for people I don’t know,and have always had an extensive prayer list for people I pray for, for all needs and intentions: for the sick, the dying, the souls of the dead, for the suffering, the struggling, for those I hear about on the news, for others I receive prayer requests, for family and friends, every time I hear a siren,etc. and I have done so for as long as I can remember, even when I was a kid, and I can even remember as far back as to when I was 12 or 13 praying for those Irish hunger strikers( that eventually died) that were protesting injustice…it has had an impact on me and touched my spirit and my soul for as long as I can remember……so could that possibly be my purpose, to pray for others? I have no doubt that prayer works, and that it reaches God, and that He listens, heals,and values people’s prayers….I think praying on someone’s behalf and for their benefit is one of the best things that you can do for someone; to ask God to intercede for them and their needs….
So who am I? Why DID God make me? What was His purpose? Even though I don’t see any purpose or reason and question all the time why I was ever born I also know that God always has a purpose and He doesn’t make mistakes and I look forward to the day that I find out and am curious for the answers….