PLEASE Pray!!!!!!

Crying PLEASE pray for us! The 17 YR old tried to KILL himself last night! We never saw any “warning” signs….nothing…it just suddenly came out of nowhere…..luckily he survived but he’ll be in the hospital for a few days. We are just all so numb, shocked, stunned, grieving, desolate, and pained. We can’t even think straight right now. This has really hit us hard and we never even saw it coming.

It will be a long road to healing. Will you please pray for him….and for us?

Church.

ChurchPews My fave. priest was there at church yesterday so I went and did a Confession to prepare for Advent( which is in just 2 weeks!) and when I told him I smoke pot for my migraines I could hear him let out a chuckle, and he said he knows someone with migraines and he’s heard that they’re “horrible” (yes, they ARE!!) and that smoking pot ISN’T a sin if it helps and that ultimately, to thank God FOR the cannabis plant, and for penance all I had to do was say an Act of Contrition and pray for someone in my family that no one else would think to pray for( so I chose my father and said a prayer for his soul) and I can bet the priest will never see me the same way ever again now,either knowing what he now knows and I can just imagine him picturing me lighting one up!

I also had a panic attack in church because it was alot more crowded than usual and I felt almost “suffocated” and even though I rationally knew that no one really WAS looking at me or probably even noticed me it felt like everyone was staring at me and whispering and  this panic was welling up inside me and building up and I just wanted to flee so I had to take deep breaths and try and focus on my “Happy Place” and “Safe Place” and then I was slowly able to calm down …..but it was a close one, and getting my make up on before church I also noticed not only were my lips blue but also the area all around them, above and below and I had to wear lipstick on my lips to cover it and put concealer on the rest to hide it.

I heard as well that an enlarged liver( like mine) can be caused by heart failure and mine is soooo enlarged now (as well as all the fluid retention) my belly’s so distended and swollen now I look like I’m 5-6 months’ prego, and my “herbalist” also came by and I got more “herbal remedies” for my migraines( he brings them over in an old cigarette box, not in a baggie like you see on TV) and it’s from a new batch as it smelled fresh and I snuck off to the shed to light one up and Buddy kept coming in to check up on me and I had to keep shooing him out as I didn’t want the poor dog to get “high” from second-hand smoke! I never got “high” either though; I never do; I don’t react to it,and, in fact, don’t get hungry like others do,either, but it rather suppresses my appetite. I’ve never reacted to things the way other people do though.

It’s also nice to see the good of humanity coming out following the terror attacks in Paris as the world unites to support the victims but it’s also disappointing to see the backlash of Islamophobia, hate and anti-immigration towards innocent Syrian refugees as a result as well. When the result is divisiveness and hate then the terrorists WIN.