I’m So Sexy!

SexyH It’s soooo sexy when……

  • My nose runs with the cold.
  •  My nose is always congested with allergies and blockages.
  •  I clomp and shuffle along in my clunky winter boots.
  • My hair looks all greasy from hair styling products.
  • I weigh as much as a baby hippo.
  • My belly flab hangs there like an apron.
  • My thunder thighs make a sound when they rub together.
  • My “muffin-top” hangs out over the waist of my pants.
  • The elastic on my socks leaves imprints on my “cankles.”
  • My fat and blubber wiggles and jiggles.
  • I get cold sores.
  • You can see all my scars from all my surgeries.
  • My boobs sag.
  • I drool on my pillow as I sleep.
  • I go around the house in my PJ’s.
  • I’m bloated.
  • I bite my fingernails down to little slivers.
  • I don’t shave.
  • I’m madder than a hatter.
  • My stretch marks are visible.
  • In winter I’m whiter/paler than a ghost

I’m so sexy! I have so “much” to offer! I’m sooooo sexy! Now you can see WHY guys are always lining up for me!

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahah!