Ascites.

Ascites¬†With my seriously swollen, distended, fat, bulging stomach( it looks like the one in the photo here) I look like I’m prego and I really wonder if I have ascites, which is a medical term for excessive fluid retention in the abdomen due to kidney, liver, or heart problems or certain cancers such as ovarian or colon, etc. I know for a fact that I DO have bad fluid retention in general( esp. in my legs and ankles) and I’m even on diuretics FOR it(and they’re NOT working; I’m still retaining fluid, and it’s so bad now that my fingers are so swollen my rings don’t fit) and my belly’s gotten so big my belly button even sticks out now,too,but I’m too embarrassed to mention it and show the doctors my fat belly(I look like a HIPPO!) and what if they say it’s NOT fluid; that I’m just a fat pig? I’d just be sooooo mortified! I’m pretty sure it IS ascites though because it feels hard like it would be with fluid,and fat would be soft and squishy…if it turns out it IS they can drain it by putting a big needle in and withdrawing litres of fluid although it does tend to just return but maybe they can put in a shunt?

As well, I found out our oldest didn’t pay off his student loan for 2 months and bought a new TV instead so it was charged to my hubby as he co-signed the loan and he was *FURIOUS*( who can blame him?) and it’s very irresponsible as you’re supposed to pay your debts FIRST and only *then* buy other things AFTER, and the 8 YR old always talks about killing Buddy and my hubby encourages him too and it really gets me upset because I love him and he’s my “soul mate” and best friend,and my hubby also made a smart remark about me listening to 70’s music but it brings back happy memories of my childhood and THAT’S the only happiness I HAVE, my memories,and he doesn’t even want me to have THAT and has to take that away from me,TOO! I also told them how when I die I want my ashes scattered along the beach in the Caribbean, a place I love and I was happy and he said he’ll scatter them in Nashville instead, the home of redneck country music that I despise, or put them in an hourglass to be used as a timer so I can still “nag” everyone from the grave and remind them to do everything even after I’m dead and gone, “It’s time for church!” “Do your school work!” “Put the garbage out!” “Don’t forget your app’t!” etc… ha, ha, very funny!