The Crack.

Screen Shot 06-16-16 at 12.27 PM This hardy weed is growing in a crack in the concrete and astroturf in our backyard porch. Despite the harsh conditions(no soil, little water) it beat the odds and somehow grows and thrives despite adversity. I didn’t have the heart to yank it up, and so I left it there, as a testimony to it’s resilience, to be able to grow and stand strong, despite the odds against it. It reminds me of myself. Despite all the traumas I have endured in my life I am a survivor. I am still here. I have survived less-than-ideal conditions, hostile environments, adverse surroundings, and unstable foundations, yet here I am. I am that weed that still stands even though by all accounts I shouldn’t be here.

Yesterday for the 15 YR old’s birthday she also went to the nail salon with a friend and they got their nails done, and they shopped at the mall and then went back to her friend’s house and she dyed her hair. The 13 YR old also saw another musical, and I like it that she’s getting some culture, and 3 of the kids made Father’s Day cards( that you can tell they worked hard on,too, not half-assed jobs) for my hubby…yet they never made me cards for Mother’s Day, using the excuse they “don’t make cards anymore”…..yeah….my foot….just not for me…do you know how that makes me feel? I’M the one that carried them for 9 months, went thru indescribable pain bringing them into this world, and nourishing them with my milk from my body, yet that means nothing…my family sucks.

I was also standing in front of the microwave about to open the door to re-heat Buddy’s food, cold from the fridge, and my mother just swoops in and butts-in  ahead of me trying to get to it to heat up her tea, and then ranted, “That f*cking dog always comes before everyone else!” and threw her cup across the room in a rage, and I told her, “It’s not the dog;it’s for me; *I* was here FIRST, you have to wait your turn!”. and then she grouses, “Who even heats up DOG FOOD anyway?”……geez…..she really IS a piece of WORK! It’s so sweltering as well( 29 C with humidex of over 30 C) it felt like my eyes were melting out of the sockets and sweat was all dripping down my head, into my eyes, down my neck and back, in my rolls of fat(ewww!) and under my boobs, yet she refuses to put the A/C on, not wanting to pay for the electricity it costs to run it! She’d rather we all die of heatstroke instead,and what’s the use of even having the A/C if we can’t even use it? It was 84 F in the house and it’s usually 70 F.

I’m sweating like a pig!