Meet My Little Friend!

Buzzy Meet my little friend, I call him “Buzzy!” It’s a *VIBRATOR!* Yes, I can’t believe it,either, but I actually did it; I bought a SEX TOY! It’s made of this really soft squishy gel, it feels soooo nice,and it’s sooooo BIG, my God,Sweet Mother of God it’s HUGE,and it’s purple, my fave. colour, has these little bumps all over it and has glitter on it……and it’s even waterproof,too! What more could a girl ask for? It takes 2 AA batteries and I even got it on sale for just 28$ but I can’t use it for a few days though because “Aunt Flow” showed up( 3 days early). Ugh.

Just my luck.

I was really embarrassed at the check-out counter at the store too but luckily the clerk was female but I can just imagine her thinking, “Oh, look! A poor desperate middle-aged lady, but  look at her….no wonder….no guy would ever want HER!” Since my hubby isn’t interested I have to look to other options( as I still have “needs”) and adultery’s a sin(not that anyone would be interested,anyway)….so…I figured why the hell not? Relieve tension, help me sleep better,and put a smile on my face! Maybe it can be my Middle-age Crisis/adventure? I’d always wondered what it would be like….my hubby isn’t too thrilled,probably afraid he’s being “replaced” and when I told my mother I’d tell her what I bought but only if she wouldn’t laugh she started laughing and said, “It’s probably disgusting…..”  and “Does it come in a plain brown paper bag?” and I told her that she’d either laugh, blush, or gasp….

Another thing crossed off my Bucket-List.

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I also saw this cute little SmartCar parked in front of next door so I grabbed my iPod and got a picture. If I could drive that’s the car I’d get.I’d get a pink one. I think they’re the cutest little thing. I saw them everywhere in Europe but here only now and then. Also a funny thing I notice too when I’m high is that I often think in one language but when I’m talking it comes out in another language, sort of like in the Bible, speaking in Tongues, except I know exactly what I’m saying, and this time I actually went INTO a song as well, I mean, I physically ENTERED a song, and it was the most amazing surreal thing ever since usually you just hear and feel the music but I actually got to BE the music.I also had this hallucination that someone was calling me so I called out and one of the kids said, “Whaaat?” and then I realized it wasn’t real and I said, “Oh, nevermind…..I thought I heard someone calling me….” and then they all laughed. Probably think I’ve lost my mind….

Screen Shot 07-13-16 at 11.39 AM This is also the cute little hippo bobble-head that I got the other day. I think that everyone should have a hippo bobble-head, don’t you think?