You know what would make me happy, what would really perk me up and bring joy into my life? It sounds completely random but it’s a bouquet of sunflowers! All of a sudden I just wish I had some sunflowers that I could put in a vase and enjoy, even though in winter it wouldn’t be the easiest thing to find right now, although perhaps a florist somewhere might carry some but they’d have to be imported and therefore expensive, so add that to my list of yet another thing that would bring me joy that’s out of my reach.It’s just the kind of thing that would really brighten my day, you know? I have visions of me in Heaven running thru a field of sunflowers,too. Speaking of winter, it’s so freezing cold as well it felt like – 27 C with the wind-chill and when Buddy was out for his walks I had a froze nose and numb buns and I couldn’t feel my face, and he couldn’t even make the rest of the walk home his poor little feet were so frozen, he was yelping and limping along it was so cold so I ended up carrying him the rest of the way home! Even in the house it’s still always so cold everyone walks around wearing a winter coat or with a blanket wrapped around them!
Someone also either broke or lost the hand mirror,making it really hard when I cut my hair to do the back so I just had to go by feel, fumbling around like a blind person and I felt like Stevie Wonder or someone, and when I bit into my Mozart Kugeln (my fave. imported chocolate from Germany) it was old, likely from last year and it was all hard and it cracked and a bunch of bugs came out of it and I grossed out, and someone left their souvlaki from dinner on a table in the livingroom,too,and Buddy got to it and I found him eating it…..right off the stick!
I had a hot flash last night when I went to bed as well and I was soooo hot and sweaty like in summer so I had to take off my shirt and just lay there on my bed topless for about 10 minutes or so until it passed and I felt cool again and then I put my shirt back on and crawled under the covers, and I should probably see my doc and get a referral to a dermatologist for my lesion on my back/shoulder that I suspect is likely melanoma/skin cancer,too, but it always takes forever to even reach him on the phone and then at least 2 weeks to get an app’t with him, not to mention months to see the specialist, and it will ultimately lead to them cutting a chunk out of my flesh and getting a biopsy and probably being told it’s cancer and all that entails….NOT something that anyone wants to hear or go thru…..it likely is, and that would explain why I’ve been so exhausted tired with no energy to do anything….
There was also this girl in church yesterday with Down Syndrome and the entire Mass she wore this big floppy black velvet hat and big dark sunglasses, movie star style, and it occurred to me that perhaps she was trying to “hide” her Down Syndrome, so that people wouldn’t be able to tell, that she was ashamed of who she was, and that just broke my heart. I don’t think that anyone should be judged , hated, rejected, or bullied for things they can’t help and have no control over, such as disabilities, race, height, weight, looks, age, colour, intellect, etc.and I think that she should just let her light shine; Down Syndrome is just a part of who she is but she’s still so much more than that,and she should embrace it and not feel she has to hide it.