A Birthday For Bob.

bmbdaynew Today is Bob Marley’s birthday!  He was born in 1945 which would have made him 4 YRS younger than my mother except that he died in his 30’s but his music and his legacy will always live on. I only wish I could have seen him in concert before he died like my friend W was lucky enough to (he even saw Peter Tosh,toothe lucky bastard!) but I was so young and I never got the chance. I guess like most great artists they aren’t truly appreciated until after they’re dead but I’ll light one up for him today. Happy Birthday Bob Mon! Let your light shine. You are eternal.

Yesterday was also the 19 YR old’s birthday and his birth( and pregnancy) was the most perilous ,worrisome,and stressful of them all, and he was born 6 weeks early, during that bad ice storm and he almost died so many times before, during, and after birth! The 13 and 15 YR olds are finally done at the dentist( for now,anyway) as well, having gone pretty well every week since before Christmas, for cavities and various other things, and the 15 YR old even had a couple of baby teeth that didn’t come out and her gums had grown all around and over them so they were removed and stitched up but there were no big teeth underneath! I also have that weird headache again that won’t go away so it will be interesting to see if another seizure is coming soon….is it a warning?

Of all the kids only one of them goes to church willingly on her own as well, the 20 YR old, without being told to,and the oldest might, although I’m not sure or not if he still does, but the others that have moved out no longer do and only 3 of them still at home do although I have to force them; if you live here, you go to church, and it breaks my heart that for the most part they’ve turned away from God and towards the world, and my fave. priest was there yesterday too so I did a Confession as you never know when you might die so this way I’m all set ,and as I confessed my penchant for sex toys since my mood stabilizers have caused me to gain weight and my hubby finds me repulsive and doesn’t bother with me anymore  I could tell that he felt badly for me and he said that it’s his loss and I “have a kind heart” and it’s “what’s inside that matters” which I thought was nice.

The 13 YR old also must somehow know that I sneak into her room at night when she’s asleep and give her a kiss ( the only  way I can even touch her or get near her) as I now noticed a new sign she put up on her bedroom door, directed at me, saying to not open the door and not go in and “bother” her as she’s either sleeping or busy…it breaks my heart; I try so hard but I just keep getting pushed away. I also missed my TV show again last night, 2 weeks in a row, last week because of some stupid beauty contest and this week because of redneck football, and I don’t even know who’s playing in the Super Bowl, which teams or which cities they’re from and I don’t care, I’m just tired of always missing my shows because of some stupid crap.Why does crap always pre-empt the good shows?

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