For Family Day yesterday I did what I do best with my family: we ate! Half of us went to Pizza Hut for pizza and the other half went to an all-you-can-eat Chinese buffet.Just the 15 YR old didn’t want to go to either so she stayed home with Buddy. Guess which one I went to? I ate soooo much I was completely and utterly stuffed! I was so uncomfortable my stomach felt uneasy for HRS and was even queasy, but I’m not sure if it’s because I pigged-out or if I might be getting sick from the virus that the 17 YR old and 13 YR old had and the 22 YR old said he’s now getting,too. The 17 and 13 YR olds took 2 heaping plates piled high with food but hardly ate much and it’s a shame to waste food ,esp. with so many starving and homeless people in the world and you’re not allowed to bring it home with an all-you-can-eat buffet and they throw out what you leave behind so we just paid extra and brought it back home with us.
I’d rather not spend Family Day with my family, esp. since I am home with them all of the time every day anyway(being a stay-at-home homeschooling mother), so my idea of a good Family Day would be away from my family,and my brother-in-law goes, “What’s wrong with you?” (something I’ve been asked many times thru my life) but what’s wrong with me is that I’m tired of the way my toxic family treats me; I’m tired of always being emotionally abused, bullied, berated, belittled, demeaned, devalued, and treated like I don’t matter and like I’m not part of this family. My mother also threatened to cancel my credit card if I “don’t stop spending”(even though I don’t buy that much and I’m tired of always having to go without), and they’re always insulting me and making me the butt of their ridicule, such as saying I “take 100 baths a day” and “leave for church a million HRS early” and the 13 YR old decided she no longer likes or wants to wear a certain shirt of hers anymore now,either, since I liked it and touched it, as if I have cooties or am infectious or contagious or something.Gimme a break!
I need a vacation.
The 13 YR old also finished putting the primer and first coat of paint up on the walls on the second-floor hallway with her home redecorating project and now it has to dry and then she’ll apply a second coat. This is the new colour, sort of a bland grey. I liked it better before. I prefer bright, lively, loud colours. They have more personality. The second-oldest also hates Toronto and doesn’t like living there,and the 17 YR old doesn’t like it,either,but I like it and I miss it and love the city! I miss everything just being right there, all the shopping, ethnic foods, entertainment, culture, diversity, festivals, etc.I really miss my old life and I wish I could move back except we can’t afford it now.Everything good is always out of my reach.