I was reading the back of a cereal box yesterday as I was eating and it said in French, Commencer votre journee which means Start your day….except I had my weed so I thought it said Start your journey, you know, kind of like a mixture of French and English, as my mind wasn’t processing too efficiently. So then I thought maybe it was meant as some sort of message or sign for me regarding my future. I’m going to be starting a journey in life. Starting over. Starting again. Something new. A new journey in life. How exciting!
It could still be true, though, but if so I wonder if it’s a new life I’ll be starting over as in moving out and living on my own, or maybe even finding love and happiness later in life, or if it means a new beginning in Heaven, that my journey will soon begin there? Change is scary but I also know that I don’t want to keep going on like this,either, and I hope I am going to embark on a journey soon that will transform , change, and renew my life….
Until then I will start each day. Start each day with hope as I wait for my journey to begin.
As well, I have bad abdomenal pain and cramps again as I often do, and I’m bleeding again too even though “Aunt Flow” finished over a week ago, and that’s what happened last month as well; bleeding in-between periods, but I guess it’s just the menopause because I get alot of hot flashes,too, but it’s really annoying whatever it is and I’m too old for this shit now. I’ve been itchy alot as well so it might be my liver acting up again, and I’ve also been woken up by headaches the past few days,too that start as a stiff neck and work their way up the back of my head.
We also heard really loud fireworks last night, and they lit up the sky and kept loudly going boom!-boom!-boom! and they were the big professional ones and at first I wondered if the military base was under attack and poor Buddy was frantic and freaking out and he was trembling and shaking and whimpering and hid under the bed, poor little guy. He hates any really loud noise, such as fireworks, thunder, or gunshots.