Not letting fear hold me back!

August 2008

Welcome back dear friends!

The other day someone told us that we’re ‘crazy” to be going to Egypt(we leave in 4 weeks! I’m excited!) and the Holy Land with the political unrest and risk of terrorism in te volatile middle East. We are even going to be escorted on our tours by a private police security escort to lessen the chance of being taken hostage or whatever.

This brings me to think: why should I let fear(of what might happen) hold me back? It’s just the way of the world; no where is really ‘safe” anymore, and although the chances of being blown up are greater in some parts of the world, I can be a victim here,too. In fact, I have been mugged a few times, in Toronto and in Los Angeles. I had just left London a couple of days before the bombings(which also happened to be in the same spot as our hotel,and on the double-decker buses we took!). I have been to other European countries where the airports have been bombed or where there have been various acts of terrorism. A thwarted bombing was averted the exact SAME day I was on a flight arriving at that very same airport. It had been planned to blow up the airport the same time I was there, but thankfully they caught them on the way there, explosives in their car!It shook me up to hear it, but at the time I was none the wiser, and glad for it!I have had an emergency landing in a plane and seen another plane I was on  get hit by lightening.Wildfires hit California days after we’d left, and when I was in Hawaii they had a big fire on the other side of the island.Talk about narrow escapes!

I have always by nature been a “worrier”; a high-strung nervous,fearful person overwhelmed with fears, anxiety, worry, uneasiness,and consumed with nerves and dread. I have had many panic-attacks and been so flattened with despair, sheer terror and worry that I could barely function. It is only by the grace of God that I have gotten thru. Needless to say, alot of times I have faced such hardships, and increasingly so as the world becomes more and more a dangerous place,even more so now I have kids..That being said, I will nOT let fear rule my life; I will continue to travel the world, to give birth to children(despite my high-risk pregnancies and complications and the stress,anxiety and fear and worry it always causes me) putting it in the Lord’s Hands; I am never alone and He is always with me.He bears me up and gives me strength to endure that I never knew I had. I will not let fear hold me back!! I still always  expect the worst but hope for the best.

and so, I will be off to the Middle East.The thought has crossed my mind of the possible danger there(incl. also earthquakes in Greece and Turkey) but I try NOT to dwell on it or to think too much about it.I put myself in God’s Hands and trust in Him. When it’s my time(to die) it’s my time.Nothing I do or don’t do will change that.  I have no control over that.He has always watched over me and I trust He will continue to do so.It is also very humbling to put yourself in His trust and know He cares for and looks after you. Wherever I go, He is close by,and I surrender all my thoughts and concerns over to Him,and asking that He ease me of my spirit of fear, spirit of anxiety, and spirit of worry.With Him I have no limits and I am assured He knows what’s best and will protect me according to His will.

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