Today’s Truth.

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Occult Symbols.

Screen Shot 10-15-17 at 07.22 PM The 16 YR old baked cookies with an occult symbol on them( seen here) even though she knows nothing occult is allowed in the house out of respect for God as this is a Christian home and the Bible says you have to choose to follow God or Satan; you can’t follow both, and we are also told to avoid everything to do with the occult, incl. Hallowe’en (Satan’s Day) and any occult symbols such as the Jack ‘O Lantern yet she continues to defy me and she also had this glittery Jack ‘O Lantern occult decoration in her room as well and she said was for a friend, for her birthday( yeah, like I haven’t heard that one before, as in, My friend needs advice,  or I’m just holding them  for a friend… yeah…..right…) so I told her in that case then to just put it in a bag and hide it away somewhere until her birthday and then give it to her but we are not to display any thing occult or have any occult symbols in this house, and if they do then I will get rid of them,and she was really mouthy, snotty, and talking back, being really defiant and disrespectful, and saying she’ll “throw out Jesus” then, etc. and snarking that it’s just my rule, no one else cares….what, so if it’s just me then it’s just to be ignored, defied,disobeyed, dismissed, who cares? I don’t think so, you little brat, and I told her if she brings in any more occult things I’m taking her phone away. I’m really tired of her and her attitude and one thing I will not tolerate is blasphemy.

I don’t think they realize(or care) how symbols have great significance and meaning, how powerful they are, what they represent, and why it’s so important to keep our home free from any occult influences. Think about the Swastika, for example, or the Confederate or the ISIS flags; what comes to mind when you see them? They symbolize something; something bad, not something you’d be proud to be associated with or would want to proudly display in your home. It’s the same way with the occult. It’s like inviting demons into your home! We don’t have many rules and this isn’t asking too much and as long as they live here, they obey the rules. The kids have broken me and beaten me down now to the point where I’ve all but given up and I have no authority, say,respect, and they just laugh in my face and ignore me and just do whatever they want while mocking me, but this is something that I will never back down on; when it comes to spiritual matters; I will not allow them to disrespect God or to bring the occult into our home.They will never take my faith from me.

The 22 YR old also kept coming into my room during the night trying to kidnap Buddy and I kept waking up so I didn’t sleep well (he’s just sooooo annoying) and my mother announced we will be moving next summer and she wants to get a bungalow as she can’t go up and down the stairs,and I have a hard time,too, but I hate bungalows, but hopefully I’ll be dead by then anyway and I won’t have to worry about it, and I should get my biopsy results this week,too, and she said they only call if something shows up so no news is good news and if they call then you know they found something. The main reason my mother and hubby said they want to move(as well as downsizing now we have less kids at home) is also to force the 22 YR old out to get his own place as he’s still living here at home and refuses to leave but when we move he has to move out, which I think is a mean tactic, but that’s what Patti also did to get her son to move out,too; she  just moved.

The leaking roof is even worse now as well and now I can see it leaking in 3 spots and we had alot of rain and now it’s soaked the towels we put on the floor to absorb the water, and the heavy rain and 100 km winds were really bad but luckily it was while I was at church and in-between when I had to walk there and back so it wasn’t raining while I was walking, and I know that was God looking out for me. Others would deny it and say it was just coincidence or just luck but I know better. I have faith and I know He answers prayer and cares about His faithful people. I know He cares about me and takes care of me and watches over me and that He loves me even when no one else does and that He must see something in me no one else does because even though my family makes me feel unlovable I still matter to God. I also have this suspicious feeling that the kids don’t really go to church Sunday mornings either but probably just walk over to Tim Horton’s or something and hang out there instead and just say they went to church. Someday I should go over there and spy on them just to have the satisfaction of catching them in the act…. I’d just love to see the look on their faces…..

 

The Roof.

Screen Shot 10-14-17 at 07.09 PM We found out the roof in the kitchen is leaking. The 22 YR old did,actually. For awhile now(it must be a couple of months now anyway, since summer) every now and then( and we have since figured out it must be every time it rains) we notice big puddles of water on the kitchen floor by the back door near the washing machine and dishwasher and we have to soak it up with towels there’s so much and we always just assumed it must be either the dishwasher or the washing machine leaking, but then we later found out the mice had chewed thru the wires in the dishwasher and it no longer works so we figured it must be the washing machine….but then…

everythingwehaveisapieceofshit……everythingwehaveisapieceofshit…..everythingwehaveisapieceofshit….

The 22 YR old must have been standing right in the precise location right under the leak in the roof at just the right time during the rain because he noticed water dripping on him from the ceiling in the kitchen and when you look up you can see some peeling paint and a brownish discoloured area so a leak makes sense and part of the roof is above the kitchen but the problem is that roofers  charge a fortune which we can’t afford, at least not without taking out another loan, which would end up being something like our fifth or sixth, as whenever there’s some sort of emergency repair that’s the only way we can get the $$$$ for it, so now our do-it-yourself repair solution is we put a bucket on the kitchen floor below the leak and now it catches the drips so the floor’s not flooded. My mother’s worried now how can we sell the house and I said just make sure when we show the prospective buyers that it’s not raining that day….and hide the bucket.

As well, my hubby said I could have gone to church yesterday evening as he could have driven me instead of today as he has to work and it’s supposed to storm today and I have to walk in the rain so I was all set to go but then at 2 pm I all of a sudden got this massive headache(I’m convinced is connected to when I fainted and fell and hit my head earlier) and I was really dizzy with it too( which was noticeable when I’d taken Buddy out for his walk and I could barely stand) so I never ended up going as I knew there was no way I could stand in church feeling like that; I’d pass out, and I’d already taken my weed earlier, at 8 am (Wake and Bake!) thinking I was going to church later on in the day so it would give it time to wear off before I went so by the time the headache came at 2 pm it had already worn off so I couldn’t even take my weed to get rid of it because I’d already had it. It probably worked out for the best too as my hubby very well could have just been setting me up,too; just saying he was going to take me just to have me get all dressed up and ready and set to go and then just not  show up, just to sabotage me, to piss me off…..either way I wasn’t able to go anyway so it didn’t matter…

The Coat.

Screen Shot 10-13-17 at 04.33 PM Check this out! The 16 YR old  designed the pattern , the style, created, sewed, and made this coat entirely on her own! It took her 2 days. Isn’t it just amazing? It looks so nice and snug and warm,too! The 14 YR old(who also sews and has been sewing for years, even before the 16 YR old started) likes it so much that she’s also going to “twerk” it a bit and redesign it a bit and make a similar one for herself in another colour. I’d heard it was going to be red but then it would look like Santa Claus’ outfit so perhaps another colour might be a better choice… and yes, she plans on studying fashion design when she graduates highschool,and she’s currently in grade 11. She has designed and created several clothing items and fashion and also has a blog on beauty and fashion, and who knows, maybe one day in the future she’ll have her own little boutique downtown in a city somewhere with her own creations?

I also had this weird headache that felt like a sharp stabbing pain in the back of my head on the left side, much like the one I had behind my right eye awhile ago I’m sure must have something to do with when I fainted and fell and hit my head hard on the floor 2 weeks ago and haven’t been “right” since ( not that I was before, only now I notice even more so) and my forgetfulness and memory is much worse now as well and all I want to do is sleep. So I took weed to get rid of the headache( which works when nothing else does) which it did but then half of my mind floated away with it,too, but at least I didn’t have the headache anymore! 🙂

I was watching the nightly news as well and had the sports muted like I always do because it’s redneck and I hate it and it annoys me and my hubby knows this so he turns it back on just to annoy me so I muted it again and we kept going back and forth in a remote control war of muting and un-muting, back and forth,and  I told him he can listen to it all he wants on his radio or news, I don’t care, when I’m not there, but not on mine; don’t want to hear it and this is my turn and to stop ruining my show for me,and then he groused in an attempt to threaten me, I’m not doing anything for you! which made me laugh actually because he hardly does anything for me now anyway other than drive me to church which he rarely even does anymore now anyway,and it’s been weeks too since I’d asked him to pick me up coconut oil the next time he was in the area(which he has been, a few times) but he could never be bothered because it’s just something for me, not a priority, not important, and doesn’t matter, and I think as well he’s probably waiting to hear back about my biopsy hoping I do have cancer afterall and not too long to live and then he won’t have to buy it at all….

F*ck him.

My hubby also programmed his Google something-or-other ( I forget what’s what it’s called; it’s this little inter-active electronic Smart device that works with your TV, phone, voice command, etc, and plays music, the radio, gives you info, writes you a list, etc..) so that it won’t turn off on my command, if it hears my voice; normally you say, Ok, Google, stop and it stops, only it doesn’t for me, no matter how many times I say it or how loud I say it. Once I yelled in exasperation, SHUT THE F*CK UP!!  and it did but only for awhile and then came back on,(it’s just like the kids; they don’t shut up when you tell them to,either!!)and then he uses it to torture me too by having it play redneck country music (that he knows I hate!!) when I’m in the room just to piss me off and then I can’t even turn it off so I just either end up unplugging it or turning off the power bar to get it to stop. See the kind of thing I always have to put up with from him? He’s what my mother refers to as a shit-disturber(and unfortunately the boys are all like that,too, learning from his bad example), always purposely doing or saying things that he knows will provoke, goad, annoy, bug, upset, or trigger me; he’s just an asshole and he’s always doing things like this just to piss me off, and then he wonders why I hate him and just try to avoid him?

F*ck him.