Half A Headache.

SunflowerShirtShelfies Yesterday I had half a headache. Well, not really half a headache but rather a full headache but it was oddly only on one half of my head! I don’t ever remember having one like this ever before, where it’s only one one side; I normally have it all over but this one was weird, just on the left side.It wasn’t a migraine or anything; just a headache, but it actually felt like my head had been divided clearly into 2 halves and divided down the middle and sectioned off so that the headache was contained just on the left side and the right side was totally unaffected. It was the weirdest thing and after I took pills it did go away….but then my abdomenal pain was back(and I’m still bleeding a bit,too) so it’s always something. I don’t think I’ve had a pain-free day in I don’t know how long.

I also ordered this custom-made sunflower T-shirt (at the same place I got my hippo shirt for my Christmas gift which has just been shipped out but the mail is still on strike so who knows when it will show up…) for my birthday gift from my hubby. My hubby also went to a meeting at church to register the 11 YR old for Confirmation. I’d filled everything out and he just had to drop it off but he didn’t want to and told me to walk up there instead  and do it even though it was at 7 pm and I don’t feel safe walking alone in the dark and we don’t let the girls walk home alone in the dark(coming home from work, for example) and either he picks them up or the 24 YR old walks up and meets them so why is it any different for me? I still don’t want to get raped or killed either.It’s just not safe for a woman or girl to be out alone at night once it’s dark. I guess he doesn’t care if anything happens to me. 😦

NOTE: I originally had more posted here, a couple of more paragraphs, but I just noticed now they have been deleted,STUFF IS NOW MISSING and when I checked my stats it said it was edited at 1 am and it wasn’t by me.. Some asshole in my shitty family has been monitoring,censoring, and editing and deleting my blog. f*ck you ASSHOLES! No wonder I hate you.If you keep trying to censor me I will just keep putting it back up.You will not silence me.If you don’t want me to post shitty things you do then maybe you should stop doing so many shitty things!!

Here is the missing part:

As well, one of the kids told me that the 19 YR old's BF is posessive and controlling, which are red flags for abuse, incl. warning for predictable future physical abuse: apparantly he isolates her from family and friends, that he's the real reason she didn't come up for Thanksgiving and isn't coming for Christmas, and he won't "let" her be friends with guys, only girls, and even then only 2 at a time and only people that he pre-approves, and every day he goes thru her phone and text messages and "screens"  and monitors them,etc.... I don't know if any of this is actually even true or not; it's just what I've been told,but it's concerning, and all the kids have been caught lying, making shit up, telling stories, causing drama, and telling tall tales, and getting eachother into trouble, so I don't know <em>what</em> to believe anymore,and when I asked the others they said it's <em>not</em> true, and I hope it's not, but if there is any truth to it, it really worries me as it's <strong>NOT</strong> a healthy or safe relationship. I don't know why she'd put up with this kind of crap though, and she's a pretty girl and would have her pick of any guy she'd want and wouldn't have to settle for anything less, so it doesn't make any sense, but it worries me...what if it really is true?... why do they always put me thru so much stress and worry all the time?


Screenshot_797 I saw this recent issue of Seventeen magazine laying around the house, it obviously belongs to the 17 YR old and I picked it up and looked thru it as it brought back nostalgic memories for me as I used to read the exact same magazine when I was a teen,too! I can still remember my friend A and I in grade 10 reading them during lunch break, and we were even under-age,too; we weren’t even 17 yet! I used to like reading about the fashion and make-up and I was curious to see if much has changed since I used to read it back in the 1980’s. I was also glad to see that it’s still around. I wonder if they still even have the Tiger Beat fangirl magazines that I used to read when I was 12 and 13? I remember taking the posters of the hunks out and plastering them all over my bedroom wall.

I was surpsied how much smaller it is now compared to then; I remember it being twice as thick, although it was mostly all ads so I can’t say that I miss that, and I was surprised to see the cover as it looked like something right out of the 80’s with the model with her hair and clothes, it looks like an issue I could have read in 1983, with her hair styled the way it is, racoon-eyes  and thick eyebrows, and with the style of jeans, the checkered shirt and the pastel sweater and scarf, the same style we wore back then. It was like when I picked up the magazine I was transported back to my teen years again. It was pretty much the same as what I remembered, and it brought me back to that time and I can still remember when A and I would see a pair of shoes, for example,like the cool running shoes, and swoon over them wishing we could buy them here, or the funky clothes, but we never could as they weren’t ever available in this country, not even in Toronto, as we’re always lagging behind and I could only finally get them when I went to L.A. such as the funky multi shades of blue denim overalls with all the pockets and zippers, and,of course, the shoes!

I have to say it was nice seeing it again as it brought back happy memories of a good time. I can’t believe it’s been 35 years or so since then, time goes by so fast and I still feel the same as I did then; I haven’t changed much at all; I’m still the same person who likes the same things I did then(except for the weed thing) and I’m still the same young person on the inside that I always was,  and still with the same wicked sense of humour,you just can’t tell from the outside,and even though the outside is all broken and falling apart and my youth is gone now, my inside is still young and I still feel like a teenager in my mind even though my body tells me different.

As well, the second-oldest has only been living in Vancouver for 2 months now and someone already stole her bike and yet she lived in Windsor all during university, 3 YRS working in Japan and a few YRS living in Toronto and it never got stolen….I guess it’s true then what the stats say, about Vancouver having the highest crime rate in the country, which I have to say surprised me as I would have thought it was Toronto or Montreal. The 19 YR old(who’s studying journalism) also is now managing editor of her campus newspaper, and the 11 YR old is preparing for his Confirmation next spring.

Confirmation Day!

Confirmation(new) Yesterday the 12 and 13 YR olds had their Confirmation! I was more excited about it than they were; they were just like, “Yeah, whatever….” and complained they looked “retarded” in their “ugly” dresses when in actual fact they looked pretty and the dresses are nice! There were 43 kids being Confirmed and I prayed as they received the gift of the Holy Spirit that they would keep their faith thru their lifetimes and that it would guide them as they go into highschool,help them stay strong and avoid bad influences, and that they would have the wisdom to distinguish truth from falsehood.

31May2015 Here they are in their dresses, with their faces edited out for privacy. They also had to wear white gowns over and the sashes that they made. The Archbishop Confirmed them, the very same who Confirmed ME all those YRS ago, only he was the Bishop back then! The 13 YR old read a prayer and the 12 YR old was supposed to but never did; we don’t know what happened if they changed the program or what but she got “bumped” or something because she never ended up doing it.The 17 and 19 YR olds were also their sponsors.

Moi(new) This is what I wore, the same fancy dress with the ruffles that I wore to my hubby’s brother’s wedding.(they’ve since split up) I also had to wear my “Spanx” girdle to hold all my wobbly bits in but it was so tight I could hardly breathe!It fit much better now my boobs are smaller,too! I also wore the little sweater to cover up more as it exposed too much shoulder and back for church, and my sparkly golden flat shoes. It was COLD,too, just 10 C and raining so I had to also wear a sweater! Afterwards they had a little reception in the Parish Centre with cake and juice.It was a good day!

I also had to walk Buddy only part-way as one of the crazy rednecks that threatened to kill me was out with her dog so we went the other way to avoid her, and the 12 and 20 YR olds were talking to their friend on Skype and to be mean and embarrass me the 12 YR old turned the Webcam around so she could see me and then the 20 YR old cackled(about me) “Doesn’t she look like a MAN?” and then she laughed. It was also the 19 YR old’s last day playing piano at church during Mass as they break for summer and then she’s off at university and they thanked her publically and gave her a gift: a Crucifix for her dorm wall, which was nice and thoughtful.

A Big Piece Of My Heart.

Buddy33 Buddy has taken a big piece of my heart. I never thought that I could possibly love a DOG so much! I’ve had many dogs in my life and I really did esp. love my Chihuahuas Teeniea, Chibby, and Yuri alot, but Buddy is by far the best dog ever and I love him with all my heart. He is no doubt my fave. of all the dogs I’ve ever had. We are so much alike and he has filled the empty void I used to have in my life; it’s like he’s the missing piece to my puzzle, and it’s not like he’s the family pet but rather a member of the family. It felt like something was missing until he came along and he has brought me a happiness and joy I had forgotten existed and that I haven’t felt in YRS. He truly is my best friend and an answer to the prayer of my heart. The kids accuse me of loving him more than them but I just love him differently, but boy, do I ever love him! He has changed my life, brightens each day and gives me a reason to smile every day.

As well, 3 of the kids went to their First Communion and Confirmation classes at church yesterday( and go again next Saturday) and the 13 YR old was arguing about her clothes as I didn’t want her to wear the frilly outfit she got from Japan that looks like Little Bo Peep as it wasn’t appropriate but she said how come the 18 YR old can go around looking like a vampire then but I don’t want HER dressing like that,either, but no one ever listens to me, anyway….just like she didn’t, either, and my hubby over-ruled me as always too so she went out looking like that. I have no authority over my own kids because no matter WHAT I say my hubby and my mother always shoot me down and veto me and my mother’s “reasoning” on it is I’m “always wrong”. The 20 YR old also jokes how I wear plastic bags on my feet inside my boots as it keeps my feet dry and warm ; he snickers I “Look like a homeless person” and him and the 17 YR old always laugh in fall with my Rasta hat and poncho I got in Mexico that I ” Look like a hobo.”

We have so much snow as well we’ve had major blizzards 3 times this week and we hardly had much snow at all in Nov, Dec, and Jan. but we’re getting it all now in Feb. and the fire hydrant in front of our house is completely buried so we had to shovel it out, and I went to visit Patti and she hasn’t shovelled her walk and the snow was so deep it went up above my knees and I had to trudge thru it, and she said once her daughter gets married in June and moves out she’ll have to move elsewhere  as her disability payments will be cut down so low she won’t be able to afford the rent where she is now but she’s still going to stay in the area though so we can still visit.