Nails And Neuro.

Screenshot_877 I saw The neurologist and while I was in Kingston I also went to the nail salon and got my nails done, as seen here and to the mall and spent the day of it. I got a French manicure and it always feels so weird having a stranger holding my hands and touching my nails I can literally feel myself tensing up and clenching, but I got thru it and it turned out really nice. I may be ugly, but at least now I have pretty nails. In the mall I also saw these funny socks that said f*cking asshole on them and it made me laugh out loud and when I came out I said to my hubby who was waiting outside, I just found the perfect pair of socks for you! I was gone all day and poor Buddy missed me so much he spent all day sulking under the couch and didn’t eat all day or come out until I came back.

The neurologist is concerned about my hallucinations which just began this summer and doesn’t think it would be due to my white matter decline unless it’s gotten really severe, and wonders if I might have brain inflammation or it’s just caused by extreme and chronic stress otherwise but he’s ordering an MRI(takes about 1-2 months to book) to take a look as well as to see if there’s any changes in the deterioration in the white matter; if it’s the same or worse than it was last year.I was surprised when he said hallucinations can be caused by extreme stress. I never knew that. Really?  Stress is my life. He asked me if there’s any possible way to lower stress in my life and I told him short of running away from home and moving to a distant far away country, no. He said as well that it’s really mean my family plays mind games with me and takes advantage of my forgetfulness.  He also had lots of bloodwork done; they took 6 vials!

 

Screenshot_878

On the way home I also took this cool photo of the setting sun. The 24 YR old always complains as well he doesn’t get enough food even though we spend 600$ a week on groceries, but he eats so much we can’t afford to feed him; he can eat 5 sandwiches for lunch, for example, or an entire pizza, but we don’t have enough, otherwise there won’t be enough for everyone, so we have to ration food to one serving or piece each so there’s enough to go around and I told him if he wants more he either has to get a job and buy his own extra food with his own $$$ or have a garden and grow his own food.It’s not fair that he eats everything and there’s none left for anyone else.

The Lights.

screen-shot-11-27-16-at-06-44-pm These are our outdoor Christmas lights! Over-the-top, yes, I know. My hubby always over-does it and out-does himself every YR and it gets sooooo tacky it looks like Snoopy’s doghouse, The Griswold’s house,or the Vegas Strip! I bet it’s even visible from space, and that NASA satellites can take pictures of it and they can see it from the International Space Station! They blink and flash on and off and even play music,too, and you can’t see it but there’s an image projected in light on a screen on a wall, but I draw the line at inflatables; those things are just crossing a line. There’s tacky….and then there’s tacky.

As well, I have to adapt to life with my new nails, incl. wiping my ass, opening up a can of pop, pulling up zippers and doing up buttons, washing my hair,attaching Buddy’s collar and leash, typing,etc. it’s a whole new world, but they make me feel glamorous,and  I know I’ll never be pretty and I’ll never be thin again but I can still have funky hair and pretty nails. I’m also worried my mother’s kidneys might be failing as she’s had lower back pain for the past week and hasn’t peed much all day today and her BP was low, but she got her blood taken and sees her doctor next week so we’ll see….

screen-shot-11-29-16-at-12-48-pm I also ordered this “smoking” shirt yesterday online for a Cyber Monday special( I saved 10$) even though it was actually  on a Tuesday but I’ve always been behind everyone else all the time,anyway! The funny thing is, I was looking for this exact shirt in the mall but never found it, so I did a Google search for “images” and when I found this picture I went to the site….and it turned out to be “Rasta Empire”……a company I already had bookmarked that I had ordered stuff from before! I was so high  as well that I thought there was a portal thru our Christmas tree,  and I don’t want to have to kill myself due to a threat that’s returned from my past,either, and endangers me, but unless there’s a miracle and it resolves in my favor, I won’t,  and  can’t live like that,and just don’t have the strength anymore to fight it or to endure living thru that nightmare again; it broke me the first  time and I simply don’t have anything left to do it again.

I heard as well that PM Trudeau is not going to Cuba to attend Castro’s funeral as it would “anger” people and it is “inappropriate” to do so,etc. but it’s actually disrespectful and rude to not go; whenever a world leader dies it’s expected protocol that other world leaders or their emissaries attend and to not go is poor manners, a sign of disrespect and just plain rude. It’s not every diplomatic,either, which is surprising considering our 2 countries get along well.What an asshole.

Neuro.

screen-shot-11-28-16-at-06-43-pm-001 Yesterday I had my yearly app’t with the neurologist. It was in a city an HR away, which also happens to be the same city that the 13 YR old was born in and the same city the 18 YR old had to go to have his leukemia treatment when he was younger. My hubby had the day off(he got from working overtime) and I made a day of it. While there I also went shopping at the mall and I treated myself to a French Manicure at the nail salon for the holidays! This was the first time I’d ever been  to a nail salon or ever had a professional manicure! I even saw an old man there getting his feet done! (ewww!!) It’s interesting how all the nail salon ladies all seem to be Vietnamese,too! The lady used this tool like a wood working polisher, then using like a small paint brush dipped a liquid in a white powder which turned to a thick gel and she put it on my nails and it burned and stung my cuticles where I had bitten them( I’m under sooo much stress lately I’m a wreck and bitten my nails really bad so I’m also hoping the manicure will deter that) and then glued the tips on and then I dried it under a warm light,and then they were buffed and polished again and coated with a clear glossy polish. It took about 30 minutes and cost 50 $ and should last 2-3 weeks and then “grows” out. It made me feel pampered and pretty,and for the first time I didn’t feel completely ugly. I also bought a glitter eyeliner at Sephora.

The doctor renewed my prescription, did a few basic neurologic tests,and I got bloodwork, and was concerned about the seizure I had last YR so I had an ECG done to check my heart( boy and I ever glad that I wore a bra! I don’t usually, I usually just go au natural but figured I’d better wear one for my app’t as you never know what part of your body they might want to look at or listen to your chest,etc.) and is booking me for an EEG( to check for abnormal brain waves) as well but it takes about 2 months. He doesn’t think smoking weed could have caused the seizure and thinks most likely due to something with my heart that caused a sudden drop in blood pressure, or that I’ve been having “silent” seizures all along but they’re so subtle they’ve gone unnoticed and now scar tissue has formed causing the Big One. He said if I only have the one and no others and if the EKG is normal he has no concerns, but if I have more or it shows abnormal brain waves then it needs to be treated using medication. He also agreed that cannabis is good for treating migraines and said he’s glad that it’s helping me.

Buddy really missed me( I was gone 6 HRS) gone for most of the day,too, he was waiting at the door for me alot of the time and sulking under the couch and when I finally did come back he was overjoyed and yelping and  jumping all over me in jubilation and when I went up to have a bath he was whining at the door and even as I sit here at the computer he jumped up onto my lap, wanting to cuddle and stay close by me. He’s just the sweetest little guy and loyal little friend. I just love him so much!