Wake And Bake.

Screen Shot 12-16-17 at 08.08 AM Yesterday I started off the day with a Wake and bake. I had this special brownie (that is, a  pot brownie) for breakfast. I had to put this sign on it so the kids wouldn’t eat it and the 23 YR old said he almost did eat it,too, and I would have been really mad, esp. since I paid 10$ for it! I never noticed any effect on me though and I shared some with him as well. Going to the dispensary the other day I felt like a kid in a candy shop and felt like Merry Christmas to me! Christmas came early this year for me! Also driving on the way home my hubby was on his phone again(which is illegal, distracted driving, and I’m always telling him not to do) and there was even a police car right in front of us, and here I was, with my purse full of weed and there he was, just asking to get pulled over, but at least I had my medical marijuana license with me, so I wouldn’t be the one going down…..  😀

Screen Shot 12-16-17 at 02.25 PM 001 This is also the Ugly Christmas sweater I got for my anniversary gift. It’s so perfect and so me. I picked it out myself. He also made me this insensitive and mean card where he drew this exploding penis that he tries to pass off as a “tree” and wrote how do I put up with him but then again he has to put up with me,too…..yeah….”nice”…..how “romantic.” When I asked where are we going out to eat for our anniversary dinner he said the disaster the other day at Popeye’s counts as our anniversary dinner, too. Is he kidding? What the f*ck? Well, that really sucks. It would have been symbolic if yesterday ended up being the day that I died,too as that was the day I did die, actually the day I first met him was the beginning of the end of my life and it would have been fitting to have died on our anniversary. My life’s been over for a long time anyway.

Screen Shot 12-16-17 at 02.25 PM 002 This is also the Doxie plaque I bought the other day and my mother opened up the medicine chest to get her pills and said to me, Did you buy more weed? It stinks like weed in the medicine chest!  Ha ha.

Screen Shot 12-16-17 at 05.17 PM 001 and here is the purple sequin backpack I bought. I’ve always loved sequins ever since I was a little kid. I think they’re so glamourous, like the fancy evening gowns the Hollywood stars used to wear to the Academy Awards. I’ve always dreamed of having a blush pink full-length sequin dress but (1) I don’t have the body for it (2) I have nowhere to wear it and (3) I can’t afford it, so getting the backpack is the second-best thing. I also have a pink and silver sequin pillow I keep on my bed. I also asked the 23 YR old’s GF (who’s American) how can USA explain Trump, esp. after Obama, and she shrugged, There is no explanation. That pretty much says it all and sums it up. I’m worried about my FB friend who recently had a baby as well; I haven’t heard from her in awhile, no baby updates anymore and she’s taken down all references and photos of her baby from her FB page and now I also notice I’ve been de-friended too even though I’ve been nothing but supportive to her as she went thru the pregnancy and birth all on her own….I’m worried something’s wrong…

The PenguinHawkEagleOwl Sparrow Hawk.

Screen Shot 12-13-17 at 06.18 PM When Buddy was outside going pee I noticed a bird of prey hiding under a bush in our yard watching him, stalking him as prey,and then it flew up on top of the fence to get a better vantage point so I quickly brought him inside and noticed the bird waited there afterwards for hours, waiting for him to return and it scares the shit out of me. I know some of these things have even swooped down and scooped up human babies and carried them off so hunting a small dog isn’t unheard of. At first I thought I was just seeing things, hallucinating, because I’d had my weed although I was pretty sure that I wasn’t and that it really was real.

At first my automatic reaction was to just freeze in fear but then instinct quickly took over and I rushed Buddy quickly back indoors, and he was completely unaware of the danger lurking just steps away from him, and then later my mother, hubby,and a couple of the kids looked out the window and also saw the bird as well so I knew it wasn’t just me and that it really was there. At first I thought it was a hawk, that it looked kind of brown although I didn’t really get a good look at it and I was kind of freaked out and worried about Buddy, so I went back later for a closer look and I thought it was a penguin as it was the right size and shape but that just didn’t seem right( I was on weed, remember) and then thought perhaps an eagle as closer inspection I could see it was a greyish-brown on top and white on the bottom, but then when I got really up close to try to take a photo( which I never got as it flew away) I could also see spots on the back of it’s head and upper neck and white “fanning” tail feathers along with 3 long ones sticking out, leading me to think that perhaps it might be some sort of owl but when I did a Google search describing it and images began to show up I was able to match it to the sparrow hawk. So it is a hawk,afterall. I was right from the beginning. I’m just glad that I saw it and noticed that it was there and that Buddy wasn’t out alone in the yard for example, or it could have gotten him and I’d never know until it was too late. I don’t even want to think about that.

It’s also really freezing cold out, – 16 C with wind-chill of – 25 C, and my medical marijuana group is having a Christmas potluck dinner and I wonder what kind of desserts they’ll have there, like maybe some special brownies or something? I bet that’s going to be one interesting party but with my social phobia I don’t like to go to parties or socialize and I feel really awkward and uncomfortable around all those people I don’t know and I never know what to say and my anxiety level goes thru the roof and I get panic attacks so I just end up staying home. My hubby and some of the kids also have a Christmas brunch at a country club this weekend one of his brothers works at. It sounds nice, but then again, too many people and crowds make me feel uneasy.

Buddy The Elf.

Screen Shot 11-25-17 at 10.00 AM Here is Buddy the elf, my little Christmas elf. The 16 YR old bought Buddy this cute little Christmas elf sweater the other day at one of those pet stores and here he is. He looks less than pleased but he’ll be grateful for it when it’s cold and he’s out for his walk. Now he has 3 warm winter sweaters to keep warm: this one, his brown argyle one, and his orange knit one. The 16 YR old also sewed him this really gay pink and white fluffy coat and frilly pink ballet tutu but there’s no way he’s going out in public looking like that. I mean, he does have some standards.

Screen Shot 11-25-17 at 06.47 PM I also made these Keep Calm things, and I tried my new cannabis oil which is a new strain they just released and it’s 30% THC ( my old one was 10%) and I’m dumb and can’t do math( it’s legendary how much of a math reject I am) and I couldn’t tell the difference between the dosage in the dropper of 0.1 ml and 1.0 ml; I thought it was the same thing, just two ways of writing 1 ml, so I took 1 ml….my hubby then informed me that they’re not the same, but,in fact, are waaay different, and that 0.1 is actually one tenth of 1.0 ml , so I ended up taking ten times the dose I was supposed to……holy shit….. that would explain why I can’t remember most of the day yesterday and it was a big blank, like a big back hole I can’t account for, like when my mother and I in the livingroom watching that movie The Dark Tower and all I could remember was the kid going thru a portal and meeting up with this gunslinger….and then before I know it, it’s the end and it’s over and my mother was saying how it was a good movie and I’m like Wow….that was sure a short movie…. and then she was making references to it such as …. and they got all the kids back ok…. so then I’m there, confused, What kids? I don’t remember any kids….. so apparantly I must have fallen asleep and slept thru most of the movie because all I saw was the beginning and then woke up just at the very end. Most of the day was like that.

I also noticed after weed that I can’t spell properly as it “jumbles” my brain and slows down my thought processes and when I’m typing I have to always go back and re-correct what I’ve written but it also makes me smarter,too, as they’ve changed the format now on my iPod with the most recent update and for days I couldn’t figure out how to upload my new songs I’d downloaded but after weed I got a brand new idea flash in my head; another way around it…..and it worked! It opens my mind and helps me to see things in a different way, from another perspective, and we also have new neighbours that moved in next door; a couple and their 4 kids and they told us that the boys have been peeking in the 16 YR old’s window….so now she has to get different curtains; the ones she has now are sheer. people are such perverts!

 

 

Cool Kid.

Screen Shot 11-22-17 at 06.26 PM After I’d had my weed yesterday I heard a voice inside my head say, Everyone knows that the cool kids smoke weed. You finally made it! You’re finally cool! and then, even in my dazed stupor I still broke out into a smile and then a laugh. Me,cool? I laughed at the thought of it but in actual fact,however, this is the closest that I’ve ever been, and will ever even remotely be, to being cool. It is, arguably, the coolest thing that I’ve probably ever done though…

The 14 YR old’s also sick and barfing and has a fever, headache,and really sore throat she rates a 8/10 on the pain scale and it hurts so much she can’t swallow and hasn’t eaten all day and it even hurts to swallow down a sip of a drink, and she wasn’t able to swallow her pills,either. Shit, I hope it’s not Strep.Hopefully just the same virus going around the house that others had. I also noticed when I was walking Buddy in the morning that Donna’s put her house up for sale,too, no doubt because her dogs have been poisoned. They have a For Sale sign up on their lawn now. They’ve lived here for 8 years and she really likes the house but has had enough of the losers here. I can see why.

Hemp Smoothie.

 

Screen Shot 10-30-17 at 03.07 PM When my newest order of cannabis oil arrived in the mail I also got a free sample of hemp powder protein so I tried it and put it in my smoothie with fruit, juice,and yogurt. You can’t really see by the photo here but it ended up turning the smoothie a gross diarrhrea green colour and it tastes like ass! At least I know what I won’t be ordering, not that I was going to but that stuff is really nasty, I mean it was gross!  I didn’t notice anything after I’d drank it either as far as how I felt although I did do a fart later on and it smelled like weed. In any case, I don’t recommend the hemp protein powder, it just ruins the entire smoothie.

Our furnace also wasn’t working and it was so cold in here so I checked it and the thermostat said it was only 64 F so I fiddled with it to try and lower the “expected” temp. so urge the furnace to come on but it still didn’t so we had to call the repairman. He came fairly quickly and he found the problem: the flooding in the basement due to the record rain we got Sunday ( 65 mm breaking the previous record of 19 mm in the 1950’s) seeped into part of the furnace at the bottom and somehow short-circuited the circuit board so he had to replace it and now we have heat again. It’s good we have that plan as well where we pay so much every year and all repairs, parts and service calls are covered and included in that plan, no matter the cost, which is good as this would have cost over 1000$ otherwise, 1000$ that we don’t have! So now the furnace guy also knows our little secret; we have now been publically outed and shamed as one of those people that already has their furnace on in October. Yes, we admit it; we’ve had the heat on. It’s been cold enough.

I also casually mentioned about tongue-f*cking jelly or cream-filled donuts, Twinkies, etc. and my hubby just gave me this really weird incredulous look and then it made me feel really weird and outcast but I can’t be the only one that does that; digs my tongue in there deep and roots it around to dig out the creamy or jam centre… my abdomenal pain’s also been bad for a whole week now and extra bad for the past 2 days and I’m nauseous at times,too, and on Sunday I had both plus I was really dizzy when I stood up and I had to grab onto a chair so I wouldn’t fall over so I wasn’t able to go to church this week and I felt really bad, but there’s no way I can walk and stand like that; I’d pass out, plus there was torrential rain I’d have to walk in; I just wasn’t up for it but now I feel guilty, like I’m playing hooky from school, like how I felt when I used to skip gym class.

I’m sad as well to hear that Henry the Hippo (Fiona’s father and Bibi’s mate) is really sick and most likely dying. He has some sort of infection and it’s shutting down his kidneys and he’s not responding to treatment. He’s 36 and Nile hippos generally live to be 35 so he is old but it’s still sad, esp. since he just recently was reunited with Fiona following months apart after her premature birth. It was nice to see the family together and now they will have a member missing soon.

Poor Henry. 😦

Update: I just heard that Henry the hippo has died. The Cincinnati Zoo has euthanized him. R.I.P Henry.

 

Weed Is My Friend.

Screen Shot 10-29-17 at 07.17 PM As you know if you read my blog, I have a legal medical prescription for weed for my migraines. I’m actually prescribed 2 g a day but there’s no way I could ever afford that so I take it twice a week as migraine prevention, but I have also found thru trial and error and coincidence that it helps for so many other things as well, and I even find if nothing works to alleviate other pain or headaches, even after trying everything else, the weed does get rid of it! So now, over the past 2 years I still take it twice a week for migraine prevention but I also take it other times in-between as well when needed too, when I have another headache or pain that can’t be relieved any other way. I could just take it daily but then my 40 ml bottle of cannabis oil would only last for 40 days….that’s just over a month….and it costs 90$ a bottle….oh, shit!

I have found that as well as eliminating my migraines if I get other headaches as well it will get rid of them , and it helps for abdomenal cramps , anxiety, insomnia, eases stress, relaxes muscles and tension, elevates my mood, calms me down, and helps me relax and sleep. It’s also good to help get your mind off things and zone out when you have one of those extra bad really shitty days and you just need to tune out and float away, and also would be good at the same time to increase times of joy, as in a celebration, to magnify your already uplifted spirit.

Weed is my friend!

My hubby also saw the title of this post as he walked by and he grumbled, Why don’t you post about your other medications,too, not just weed all the time! so, in that spirit, here are the other medications I take as well:

Topamax for migraines

Atenolol for high BP

Sulcralfate for stomach ulcer

Lasix for fluid retention/edema

Prozac for depression

 

and of all of them weed has the best side-effects. 😀

The Roof.

Screen Shot 10-14-17 at 07.09 PM We found out the roof in the kitchen is leaking. The 22 YR old did,actually. For awhile now(it must be a couple of months now anyway, since summer) every now and then( and we have since figured out it must be every time it rains) we notice big puddles of water on the kitchen floor by the back door near the washing machine and dishwasher and we have to soak it up with towels there’s so much and we always just assumed it must be either the dishwasher or the washing machine leaking, but then we later found out the mice had chewed thru the wires in the dishwasher and it no longer works so we figured it must be the washing machine….but then…

everythingwehaveisapieceofshit……everythingwehaveisapieceofshit…..everythingwehaveisapieceofshit….

The 22 YR old must have been standing right in the precise location right under the leak in the roof at just the right time during the rain because he noticed water dripping on him from the ceiling in the kitchen and when you look up you can see some peeling paint and a brownish discoloured area so a leak makes sense and part of the roof is above the kitchen but the problem is that roofers  charge a fortune which we can’t afford, at least not without taking out another loan, which would end up being something like our fifth or sixth, as whenever there’s some sort of emergency repair that’s the only way we can get the $$$$ for it, so now our do-it-yourself repair solution is we put a bucket on the kitchen floor below the leak and now it catches the drips so the floor’s not flooded. My mother’s worried now how can we sell the house and I said just make sure when we show the prospective buyers that it’s not raining that day….and hide the bucket.

As well, my hubby said I could have gone to church yesterday evening as he could have driven me instead of today as he has to work and it’s supposed to storm today and I have to walk in the rain so I was all set to go but then at 2 pm I all of a sudden got this massive headache(I’m convinced is connected to when I fainted and fell and hit my head earlier) and I was really dizzy with it too( which was noticeable when I’d taken Buddy out for his walk and I could barely stand) so I never ended up going as I knew there was no way I could stand in church feeling like that; I’d pass out, and I’d already taken my weed earlier, at 8 am (Wake and Bake!) thinking I was going to church later on in the day so it would give it time to wear off before I went so by the time the headache came at 2 pm it had already worn off so I couldn’t even take my weed to get rid of it because I’d already had it. It probably worked out for the best too as my hubby very well could have just been setting me up,too; just saying he was going to take me just to have me get all dressed up and ready and set to go and then just not  show up, just to sabotage me, to piss me off…..either way I wasn’t able to go anyway so it didn’t matter…

2 Years.

Screen Shot 10-12-17 at 07.07 PM It’s been 2 years since I had my last migraine . Yes! Really! Honestly! No fooling! The reason is, because it’s been 2 years I’ve been using marijuana, that is, good old weed, that’s right, cannabis, which completely eliminated my migraines, which had begun to break thru once again even on my anti-migraine medication but now have stopped entirely.

I still remember it clearly; it was October 2015 when I last had a migraine and when I first tried weed as I’d heard it helps and I was desperate to try anything for relief. Not only did it eliminate the migraine I had but it prevented future ones and I also found it alleviated any other types of headaches, pain, or cramps I might have as well,and it also eases my anxiety, lessens stress, helps me sleep better, and relaxes suicidal thoughts, but the odd time I might also get a bonus,too, an added side-effect, such as like being able to leave my body, go to another dimension, feeling colours and sounds, seeing the walls breathe in and out, floating along on a wave of sound,etc..

It’s kind of funny in a way too as I never did weed growing up so I’m like what my mother refers to as a late bloomer; I didn’t start smoking pot until I was 48!  😀 It took a couple of months for it to actually take effect though, to work, as far as feeling “high”; it never did anything for the longest time, it was so funny, I wondered if maybe I was doing it wrong or maybe even”broken” somehow or something and maybe I wasn’t capable of getting high perhaps but it turned out it was just like with sex; it took 2 weeks of doing that too in the beginning before I found out what an orgasm was, it was just like all of a sudden…Oh! So that’s what’s supposed to happen!! although not so much as much with my first experience getting high; it was scary actually and I thought I was dying(I was scared and called over my oldest who was dying laughing and said something to the effect of, You’re fine! You’re just high as f*ck!) ; it felt so weird at first it freaked me out and was just so overwhelming and intense I think my brain just never knew what hit it…. Interestingly, I only get high probably about 1/10 times I have my cannabis oil; it’s not a common thing, usually I just fall asleep.

So now I have a legal medical prescription I have re-newed once a year after a visit with the doctor, but soon it will be legal not only for medical use but for recreational use as well so maybe the cost will go down? That would be nice… and so it’s been 2 years of using cannabis, of being called a druggie, etc. by my hubby and kids as yet another way to degrade me and put me down, of thanking God for His herbs and medicines, 2 years migraine-free….migraine-free…..something I never thought I’d say….yet here I am now, 2 years later…..migraine-free….. thanx to weed….. thanx to weed I am now migraine-free….and I also have a smile on my face and groove to the music,too! 🙂

It’s a gift from God”. – Michelle Philips

 

The Proper Way To Eat Viva Puffs.

Screen Shot 10-10-17 at 04.44 PM  At the eating disorders clinic yesterday  the 14 YR old had some Viva Puffs cookies (pictured here) for her snack and as she picked off the chocolate top and popped the tiny pieces into her mouth bit by bit they scolded her to take bigger bites and not nibble as it’s “disordered eating….” except in this case this is the unofficial proper way to eat Viva Puffs! Everyone I have ever known has ever eaten them this way,myself included; there’s a right and proper way to eat a Viva Puff and it’s like this: first you have to break the top so it cracks and then you peel off the chocolate, bit by bit, and pop it into your mouth, until just the marshmallow is visible and then you bite that off, bit by bit, and only then do you bite into the jam and cookie at the base! Under no circumstances do you ever take bites out of the entire thing intact or pop the whole thing into your mouth! You just don’t, that would just be wrong ,and if you do then there is something inherently wrong with you! That’s just the way to eat Viva Puffs, the right way, the proper way, the only way, and everybody knows it. I mean, who doesn’t know that? Seriously, though, really, what’s wrong with people?

As well, driving to the clinic is nice this time of year now in fall seeing all the different colours of leaves on the trees and yesterday was really foggy as well esp. in the flat land areas and rural areas and farmlands along the way and I saw a roadkill I’m not quite sure what it was but by the long thin shape I’d guess probably either a ferret or mink,and it’s tail was separate from the rest of it and it just struck me as so sad and the 14 YR old gained 300 g again, slow but steady progress and at least she’s gaining weight and not losing so it’s still an improvement but she said she still doesn’t feel any different on the inside so I suggested maybe they give her a complete overall psychiatric evaluation just in case maybe there’s something else that we’re missing as well on top of the eating disorder, as it’s possible she could not only have the eating disorder but another condition as well that’s gone unnoticed and being overlooked…

I also noticed as well in the week since the polyp’s been removed from the colon that my shits have been normal; no more diarrhrea, at least not yet, not so far anyway, and my Facebook friend with cancer found out that she’s dying,too, and they said they don’t think she’ll live to Christmas which is sad, and it was so sudden and unexpected, and my hubby was insultingly referring to my music and referred to it as, What’s that annoying noise I keep hearing? to which I replied, The only annoying noise I hear is your voice! I swear, he’s such an asshole. Whatever shit he sends my way I just send it right back though. I’m not putting up with his shit. I’m just so fed up with that f*cker and all his crap.

Funny as well: I head harsh hacking coughing coming from the 22 YR old’s( 23 next week!) bedroom when him and his GF were in there, behind closed doors so I yelled thru the door, Are you guys smokin’ weed in there? and then after a short pause I added, If you are, save me some! and then I heard laughter, and it hit me when I realized what must have been so funny: usually when parents catch the kids smoking weed they’d be mad and tell them to quit it but not me(I’m the Cool Mom, ha, ha); he’s an adult and he’s over 18; I just wanted to make sure if they were that they saved some for me,too! 😀  As it turned out though they weren’t; his GF was just choking on a popcorn so I told her to have a drink and wash it down.

My Day.

Screen Shot 09-02-17 at 06.39 PM You know that Charly Black song This Is My Day where he says it’s his day off and he’s not going to work at all but just relax and smoke( weed) all day?  Well, that’s sort of what yesterday was like for me. It was My Day. The rest of the family still hadn’t come home yet after a few days away in Toronto and Ottawa on their mini-vacation and I took the entire day to just have a nice relaxing day to chill out, pamper myself, indulge, relax,and enjoy.  I uploaded some new music onto my iPod(I just couldn’t find a Scorpions song I was looking for), I put a nice bamboo,sandalwood, and teak scented bath bomb into a nice deep tub full of hot water and submerged into a nice relaxing hot bath until the water got too cold and the skin on my fingers and toes wrinkled.I even opened up a new tube of toothpaste and indulged instead of always squeezing the last gooey gobs out of the old tube! I dyed my hair,too, toning the platinum blonde of summer down to a light ash blonde for fall, and the other day I also put the fall decor up,too.

I also found some old Easter chocolate( from either this year, or maybe even last year….who really knows…) and I was so overjoyed at my find I gleefully ate it all….until I saw it had bugs in it and realized I’d eaten some, and I also had my weed, so I lay out in the sun and chilled out and relaxed,just floating off, imagining what it would be like if the clouds I was staring up at were tie-dye, and I hung out with Buddy, my faithful companion, picking off imaginary bugs out of his fur, and there’s nothing like the love of an old dog. ♥

We also ordered in KFC delivery for dinner for the 4 of us that still remained at home but it was tricky for me managing to order it online as I was high as f*ck and it was really complicated and my brain couldn’t comprehend it and I had a really hard time trying to process it. I also was fascinated with the moss I had discovered had grown on our outdoor backyard green porch carpet and I kept running my fingers along it-it felt like velvet- and now it looks like Astroturf. I also came to the realization that I’m beautiful, only on the inside, so no one sees it.

The 22 YR old’s GF and her parents also arrived from California so she can settle into her college campus and dorm, which is in a town about 20 minutes away from here, and hopefully they can also come over for a visit here before they head back home,too. I expect they’ll be my future in-laws ( at least I think that’s the term used of the parents when their kids marry eachother) and it’s so cute seeing the 22 YR old and his GF together too, they’re just so sweet! She already feels like a part of our family and the girls see her like a sister.

.Random parting thought: Sex, drugs, and rock & roll!  😀