The weirdest things I have ever done.

Here are the weirdest things I have ever done(but I guess it also depends on what you consider to be “weird!”):

When our then 7 year old son lost his hair to cancer 3 years ago I also shaved mY head into a Buzz-cut!! I feared people’s reactions, but surprisingly it has for the most part, been positive!! 🙂 I get the odd snicker, dirty look, or snide comment(usually from little old ladies!) about my being a “punk”, or a “dyke”, a “man”, a “rebel”, “Neo-Nazi”, “Skinhead”,etc.. but a lot of people have actually complimented me on it and even admired it! I have kept it even later as it has “grown”(ha ha) on me; as I find it very liberating with no hair; easy-care and great for swimming and travelling, and no worries anymore about styling,gels, hair dryers,flat-irons, dyes, etc.. and it has now sort of become my own unique signature style!! It’s funky,off-beat and challenges social norms at the same time; it gets people to look beyond the outer appearance and see inner beauty.It also brings about more cancer awareness too, I think, and figure I’ll never be pretty,but I *CAN* be different!! I love it!! (a bonus as well; it makes me look even younger!)

I tried to dye my hair blonde years ago at home and it ended up half a bright yellow and half a bright carrot-orange…

I had this horrible perm years back where i ended up looking like an electrocuted poodle!! Needless to say, I wore a ha all that summer and then had it all cut off mega,ultra short…

Geez, come to think of it, I HAVE had a lot of hair disasters….I guess it is good I wear a Buzz-cut afterall; what can possibly go wrong with it, right?…and no more hat-hair, bed-head, wind-blown hair, etc.. either!

When I was about 7 years old or so I challenged my mother’s advice to not put your tongue on cold frigid metal as it will stick…..of course, being a dumb little kid that I was, I didn’t believe it and had to find out for myself….I stuck it on a metal fence pole in the winter….and of course it stuck…I pulled and pulled and had to rip the sucker off, leaving behind a few layers of skin and blood, plus a very sore tongue!! Ouch.Lesson learned!

Speaking of tongues, when I was the same age I was also practicing a skating jump but landed the wrong way and went crashing down, flat on my stomach with my chin slamming on the ice, mouth a gap in surprise….biting right thru my tongue, top to bottom,so off to the hospital I went where they held me down and gave me like over 200 stitches to sew it back up…..man, did that ever hurt! I can still remember it even to this day, like 34 yeas later!

This one will make you both laugh and gross-out at the same time:walking inthe hall at school I saw what I *thought* was little chocolate nuggets on the floor,where I then proceeded to pick one up and eat it….but it was shite!! I quickly spit it out….and when I say something “tastes like shite!” I really KNOW what I am talking about!!

I was a weird kid: I used to pick crap up off the floor,road,or sidewalk and eat it, anything from gum to cigarette butts. I even ate an ant at camp once for 25 cents when a kid bet me to do it.It was a red ant,and it had a very bitter after-taste,I can tell you that!!

I still posess the “gift” of being able to turn my eyelids inside-out and to put my thumb bent down all the way to touching my arm, below my wrist; flat, all the way against it.

I once touched a barbed-wire fence.let’s just say it was a shocking experience…

I went down the stairs about age 5-6 on my knees, with my legs tucked up underneath,and sailed all the way down, hitting my head and knocking myself out unconscious!! Not exactly a smart move on my part, I’d say!

Not a very “smart” kid(although I did still somehow manage to survive to adulthood!!) and an unusual adult,too!! God made everyone special….. 🙂

A friend and I in grade 8 switched shoes and we each wore one of eachother’s shoes to school for the day; she had one purple and one pink,and so did I.

I tricked a friend of mine. I had rolled up a brownie into a turd-shape and carefully placed it on my dog’s paper on the floor. I told him it was a dog turd and said if he gave me a dollar that I’d eat it. He did, and so did I. He put his hand over his mouth and almost barfed!! I never did tell him it was a joke…

A friend and I dressed up like hippies one day in 7th grade.We took the streetcar all the way downtown like this and everyone stared at us.

We once had the most obnoxious neighbors in the whole world living next-door to us.One day I had finally had enough so exacted revenge: we let the air out of his tires,put his license plate on upside down, stuck peanut-butter bread slices to his van windows,and poured molasses on his front window of his van.Sweet. I still chuckle to this day when think about it.

I had a party and invited my friends over but before they’d arrived I “doctored” the fortune cookies I bought at a Chinese grocer. I carefully using tweezers pulled out the real “fortunes” and typed up my *own* versions, saying wacky things,and cut them to size,and put them back in with the tweezers again. When the guests cracked open the cookies they’d be shocked to see things such as “you will drop dead within 24 hours…”

When I was about 4 years old I played “barber”…with my own long hair! This was a day before school ended and I had 2 ponytails one up on each side of my head,and I chopped them off, but unevenly…..so when my hair was let down it was all jagged and zig-zag.My mother was aghast and horrified and rushed me to the hairdresser for a fix-up.This was my very first “pixie” haircut!! 🙂

As a kid I used to do prank phonecalls.(THis was before call display,of course!) and I remember one time calling and asking “Is Jesus there?” and the voice on the other end politely replied,”Sorry, but He just went out.I’ll have Him call you when He gets back!” it was so funny!!

In grade 8 I used to make this really weird sound that sounds like a walrus.I’d do it so loud and it would always startle people ad crack everyone up laughing, esp. if done at the most unexpected time or place.

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